Myspace in The OpenDiary (OD) Days!

myspace - 7/26/2005

         "Obvious" - Anthony Callea

We started as friends, Then something happened inside me, Now i'm reading into everything, But there's no sign you hear the lightning

        And you don't even notice me turning on my charm, 
        Or wonder why i'm always where you are

        [CHORUS]
        I've made it obvious, 
        Done everything but sing it, 
        (I've crushed on you so long but on and on you get me wrong), 
        I'm not so good with words, 
        And since you never notice notice the way that we belong, 
        I'll say it in a love song

        I heard you talk about, 
        How you want someone just like me, 
        But everytime i ask you out, 
        We never move past friendly

        And you don't ever notice how i stare when we're alone, 
        Or wonder why i keep you on the phone

        [CHORUS]
        I've made it obvious, 
        Done everything but sing it, 
        (I've crushed on you so long but on and on you get me wrong), 
        I'm not so good with words, 
        And since you never notice notice the way that we belong, 
        I'll say it in a love song

        You are my first thought in the morning,
        (and the last one at night)
        You are the love that came without warning, 
        I need you, i want you to know

        I've made it obvious, 
        So finally i'll sing it, 
        I'm not so good with words, 
        And since you never notice the way that we belong, 
        I'll say it in a love song

        I'll sing until the day you're holding me, 
        I've wanted you for so long but on and on you get me wrong, 
        I more than adore you and since you never seem to see, 
        I'll say it in this love song

I've run out of jokes for the time being, so I've had to stick with a favourite song of mine at the moment.  hehe.  I just really like the lyrics.  Anthony sang it at the concert on Sunday - it's really sweet.  I'm still hanging out for Tina's new album though hehehe.

I find it amazing how so many of you don't know who she is.  I guess I remember me growing up with a tv in my room back on the farm, and I used to get up really early on Saturday mornings so that I could watch the Top 50 contdown on 'Rage'.  Tina Cousins had her first hit here called 'forever', which made like number 20 or something a few years ago, and every song she's released after that one, I've just loved.  Her current song in the charts here is "Wonderful Life" (for all you people lucky enough to have dsl and can download it in like 2 mintues flat - damn you!).  I hate dial-up, especially after I USED to have DSL, and just can't get it where I am now.  Oh well, I guess I should be happy I have internet at all.  My music downloads just take a few hours.

Well I ended up going to my ex's on Monday night.  That was interesting, as it always is when I go there.  He's gotta be the single most intriguing gay guy you'll ever meet.  He's a great guy, and we get along great now (we went out like 2 years ago now), but every time he becomes overly-affectionate with me, I back right off and it really annoys me.  I don't have the heart to say I don't like it when he puts his head on my arm or my leg - it just.. pisses me off for some reason.  I just want a normal friendship with him, and nothing to remind me of the relationship I guess.  I can't think why else I get like that around him!  Met two new gay guys - he knows so many and they always seem be be at his house - they were getting pretty comfy on the couch as i left.  He has a knack for setting people up I guess.  One of em was kinda cute - reminded me of me - really quiet :)  other one was a kiwi, hehe loved the accent.

I haven't really done that much recently other than go back to work today after an awesome weekend.  I'm still on a high from seeing and hugging Tina Cousins and getting her Autograph.  I found out she's going to be playing at the wickham (a gay bar here) next month as well, so I really wanna go in and see that.  It's a small fun thing called 'hoe-down', and there's a best-butts and a best-dressed competition.  Might enter the 2nd one hahaha!  Just find a cowboy hat somewhere.  But it's boring when you don't know anyone to go with. 

One of my friend's is being weird and annoying.  he reckons that since now I'm single, that I'd be interested in a threesome with him and some other guy he knows.  I'm like 'fuck...off!'  gee, what am i? A crack-whore?  Might not be that bad yet! lol.

Oh, most exciting thing I did yesterday was create a myspace account.  Well I've had it for a while but never added anything to it cos I didn't like it.  Everyone else seems to have one!  Unreal.  Guess it's the saying, 'if you can't beat em, join em'.  It's www.myspace.com/luvncraze if anyone's interested lol.  I put quite a bit on it, but I'm really tryna make more friends!  They are few and far between!  I also figured I needed something more appropriate than trying to make decent friens on gaydar - which is near-impossible if you're not looking for sex or hook-ups.  Geesh.

i was gunna go to bed before, but realised I forgot to turn on my electric blanket when I got home, so I have to stay up, and as luke's not here, I decided to write an entry.  Now I can even write an entry while he's in the room, but I still like to be by myself when I write an entry.  You know, it's just like your personal-space kinda thing.

I'm suppose to be going clubbing this saturday with workmates, so I hope I have a good time.  And Sunday I'm hanging out with Addam, who is Yuie's boyfriend.  Yuie's back from Mexico, so Addam's all excited about it.  He's bringing Sarah along.  Must say I'm a little disappointed about that, only cos of my fear of hanging out with chicks, but she is his best friend I guess.  I'm so an odd-out gay guy.  Most gay guys have a girl as their best friend.  My best friends are all guys.  Ah well, I'll see how it goes.  We're going shopping at Indooroopilly cos they have the huge shopping centre.  Not that I have much money to spend.

Luke's out somewhere again.  He's probably got some other guy now for all I know.  Still seems everything so secret, but I guess that doesn't really matter now what he gets up to.  Damn I wish he'd stop walking around here shirtless though.  His body is amazing and I just think it's unfair and upsetting I have to see it.  I mean sure he's hot as, but not being able to touch him anymore is so...so hard.  He was on the phone before and rubbing my leg in cirlces for some reason.  That was strange.  I kind of almost wanted to pull away, but it was peaceful at the same time.

I lost my credit card yesterday!  i went to the library, and was going to go shopping at Koorong to get some music dvd's i wanted, and realised i didnt have my card.  So I thought I must've left it at home, so I drove back home (in the opposite direction), and searched EVERYWHERE for it.  I couldn't find it and near panicked.  I decided to drive down to the shopping center and cancel the card and order a new one, so I did that.  It was pretty easy actually, and at least now I wont have to renew my card in November!  She gave me a temporary card to use, so I used it to buy my dvd's.  I went back to the southside to Koorong.  I hate shopping at Koorong cos it's so expensive.  Anything Christian you want to buy costs so much!  I ended up getting 'wow number 1's' and 'Stacie Orrico, Live in Japan." - I love them both!  i probably have no money left now though, after paying rent for me and luke (he still has to pay me back yet - he's starting to get behind which is starting to worry me.)

I went shopping at the IGA yesterday.  Figured I'm sick of woolies for a while.  It's just up the road.  Turns out if I just keep going up that road, it take me to work!  So I found an alternative way to work!  Haha all this time and I only just found out.  i mentioned it to Luke and he goes, 'Yeah I knew that.".  nice of him to tell me! lol.  i went that way this morning.  I think it's a similar distance, but there's a lot less traffic, but a few more traffic lights I guess.  I'll probably go that way more often from now on.

I don't remember if I mentioned this previously, but I've been having sex dreams lately.  I know, strange.  And the person who it's with is rather interesting as well.  i won't mention who it is, but it's damn hot lol!  They say when you have sex dreams, you're craving affection.  i think I heard that somewhere.  I don't think my stuffed doggy is doing the job for me.  It smells a bit dusty for my liking, and is cold when I go to bed cos it's on the side of the electric blanket that doesn't get used anymore.

I met a cool guy on the net tonight who is apparently a friend of one of my gay workmates, so hopefully we might actually talk at work one day.  One of the girls on checkouts today said she saw me at the Bronco's game, and she thought about saying 'hi'.  I told her she should have!  That woulda been such a surprise!  i absolutely love it when people go out of their way to say hi to me.  That means a lot to me.

Anyway hopefully my bed's warm now.  I'm off to sleepsies hehehe.  Take care guys!!  I'm sorry if I haven't noted you lately, I'll get around to it!  So many of you shouldn't have such awesome diaries, there are SO many to read LOL.  Bye! :)

Oh crap, Jerry Springer's on TV next... well bed can wait lol...

This has been tv tonight - Simpsons, Neighbours, Big Brother, Australian Idol, The Swan, Rove Live, Playing It Straight, Queer as Folk, ET, and now Springer!  I mean gee, what are they trying to do? Make me a couch potato? I love tuesday viewing! :)

 

Notes: --------------------------------------------------------------------

HI...ok, well i guess it's not the same since I didn't really have to go out of my way. lol. Over here in the US, TV sucks on tuesday nights, well for me at least. Glad to hear that things are going well. Take care buddy. [C-Dub85] 7/26/2005 10:39:13 AM

The sex dreams aren't weird. Everyone has them about me, so don't worry. You aren't alone. J/K :p [SilverScorp83] 7/26/2005 12:11:03 PM

awwwww I hope you have fun clubbing and don't stay home watching tee~vee lol Huggs and loves Mermz

[Mermy] 7/26/2005 12:39:34 PM

Holy crap I can barely keep up with your diary let alone myspace! Geez! [Orange Blossom] 7/26/2005 1:29:37 PM

hope things get better for you. Talk to u later. Luvs Ya a lot!! Take care! ~Rachel~ [tankerbrat8386] [p] 7/26/2005 1:40:52 PM

oh Ill add you on myspace!!!

yeah~ [fries] 7/26/2005 3:53:07 PM

that's interesting. definitely all of my friends are girls, except the occasional gay guy, and a few straight boys who don't really act straight anyway.

i'll try to find some more jokes for you!!

don't worry about what luke is up to. you can do better! [HotGayBoy80] 7/26/2005 5:13:15 PM

Hi Matty it's me Jeffy! So Luke is still walking around with no clothes on and it bothers you? Walk around with no pants on in front of him, see if it bothers him. :-)Sex dreams huh? As long as there's not an animal involved you have nothing to be ashamed of. Have no clue what this gaydar is you talk about. Matt walking around with an antennae saying "there goes one!" We'll talk.

Love/hugs Jeffy [mobyduck] 7/26/2005 5:20:47 PM

Im craving affection myself lately.All day long and for the past few days,I wish I could be alone with Willie and just wrap myself in his arms and get lost.You make me want to go shopping now.Hope you have a awesome time this weekend.Ive became a different person.Before I never went out, now I go out almost everynight. Anyway love ya kiddo, take care of yourself!

-JJ :) [shrektrek] 7/26/2005 5:39:31 PM

ahhh the dreaded looking good but can't touch i know the feeling. i thought i lost my credit card once i was about to have a fit. [VIRGIN GIRL] 7/26/2005 5:43:23 PM

dude i'm a myspace addict...you're totally getting added to my friends list...like NOW.

xox [Indigo Sky] 7/26/2005 5:54:21 PM

ok you're added =) you had best accept or I'll cry! haha. Love ya,

Hel xox [Indigo Sky] 7/26/2005 5:56:16 PM

I've had a few of those sex dreams too. But what burns my ass is that it's always with some guy I don't even know. And I always, I mean always wake up before I shoot my load. That sucks. LOL Matt you sound like you're doing pretty good. I'm proud of you. Never let anyone get you down for any length of time. Love ya buddy! I mean it too.

Hugs,

ben [Taste The Rain Bow] 7/26/2005 6:56:08 PM

Aww. I'll show you affection... grin and BIG HUG

Do you have a picture of this Luke you speak of? I don't believe he's that hot... lol, so you gotta show me one. LOL, just kidding, you don't have to.

Anyways, glad to see you're writing...

Hugs and kisses...

-James

[Beez] [p] 7/26/2005 7:53:03 PM

i read this, and i can comment. but i choose not to. well . . . excpet for the part about aussies in mexico! wohoo! :-) by the way, you're really, really handsome. did you know that? i would love to go to a formal dance with you, dressed in a tuxdedo, and dance the night away lost in your eyes. :-) (but i'd have to go back to my baby at the end of the night.)

[Prince Zidane] [p] 7/26/2005 9:44:18 PM

Well, Sir, I'ma going to add you to my MySpace, if that's okay with you. Maybe there we can talk about these dreams that you and I have been having. Obviously, we both need some kind of affection, eh?

*- [chikinstukrakir] 7/27/2005 2:05:24 AM

yeah, I know what you mean about writing and OD entry when you are alone. It is somehow a very personal thing to do. Cripes, forgot that it is winter where you are at! An electric blanket would kill anyone in the USA right now! Sounds like you are doing good with the Luke issue. Glad you seem to be moving on! XO! [pizzaguy184] 7/27/2005 2:46:00 AM

RYN: Or purple or green or... [Sex Hound] 7/27/2005 11:55:26 AM

hey dude thanks for the note :)

Love the fact that the credit card people made sure you were able to keep spending. They're all sharks, like the guy on the ads says.

TV's only good with Foxtel. Hmm timeshift channels...

Catch ya later :) [theotherme] 7/27/2005 1:06:44 PM

RYN: Pick you? But I thought you had a boyfriend. [jpmoneyz] [p] 7/27/2005 1:17:48 PM

ryn: Thanks! Gosh, you are so nice!

I have never heard of this Tina Cousin...but I shall look her up. Its really cool that you met one of your fav singers though. : ) You meet so many gay guys...I didn't know there were that many out there!

[le mockingbird] 7/27/2005 3:58:43 PM

If the name rings a bell then you will have probs heard "Sing Sing" that was their debut track from their first album, it's a great song, really catchy. You should download it for sure =)

xox [Indigo Sky] 7/27/2005 4:42:32 PM

I said sing sing and its swing swing...im such a dumbass. [Indigo Sky] 7/27/2005 6:13:53 PM

I know what you mean about having too much to read on here! I had to do some "Favorites" cleaning up since I wasn't able to keep up with everyone and some people hadn't updated in so long that I couldn't remember why I added them in the first place.

How do you always have so much to say? Are you sure you're not a woman?

wink

XxX [OnSecondThought] 7/27/2005 10:31:23 PM

I'm adding you to my myspace friends. :)

♥ [~Tiffany~] 7/27/2005 11:30:19 PM

Ryn: Ohhh... that sucks man. I'm sorry. I haven't read anyones diary in a while, and didn't know. [jpmoneyz] [p] 7/28/2005 12:29:44 AM

i have a myspace too!!! i'm so going to add you RIGHT NOW!!! [KatieKatherine411] 7/28/2005 1:43:04 AM

ryn: aw, thank you. you're the best. I would so want to be best mates with you if I knew you in real life, like.

and rahul? hehe, he isn't all that bad a kisser, though when he started out, he used to kiss like he was eating fish fingesr. I had to teach him things, gah.

take care, matt.

...

oh, btw, I wasn't here earlier, but I'm so sorry about Luke and all. bear hugs laters. [Ness, Indophobe.] [p] 7/28/2005 3:30:42 AM

Dear Matt..

Are you still reading me. I hope youu still love me haha. Huggles. [Xi'a] 7/29/2005 12:10:30 AM

Glad you enjoyed the video, I know its a very addictive song...lol, anyway talk to you soon and I'll have to check you out on myspace as I have an account too...Later.

Huggs!!!

[GardenBoi] 7/29/2005 11:39:51 AM

damn your hot on the myspace pic! [Archer_Mage] 7/29/2005 5:50:28 PM

hey! long time no note for either of us:P. i lost my bankcard the other day, that was a pain in the backside, but probably good because i'm trying not to spend money unless i will absolutely cark it if i don't get something...you know, warm clothes, umbrella for when its pelting down, bus tickets to get home...stuff like that:P. glad 2 hear ur still going well! note me!:) take care:P. xxx [dysfunctional_faerie] [p] 7/30/2005 8:35:08 AM

===========================================================================

---

Last updated May 13, 2014