The negative repercussions of desires and attachments in Daydreaming on the Porch

Longing to be elsewhere, our minds settle on the belief that the current moment is never enough, we’re not enough, or we can’t do enough, it’s all so empty. The problem with this kind of thinking: When the awaited event does occur, happiness may not come with it. This motive of trying to fix the current moment leaves you in a perpetual cycle of dissatisfaction.

From Uncovering Happiness: Overcoming Depression with Mindfulness and Self-Compassion. by Elisha Goldstein

Recently, I’ve been projecting worries onto the future: health, aging, lack of contact with others, loneliness, not getting to the many books, I want to start reading, etc., and on and on. Then I find myself wasting time in the present feeling that my ego and self-esteem ride on how frequently my friends online and in person respond to my texts and emails. As the days, and even weeks tick away with no response, I begin to feel both dejected and rejected. Why can’t people be like me and respond in a timely fashion? Why are people so wrapped up in their own lives?

How absurd and immature, when I think about it. At my age I shouldn’t have egoistic calculations about others. They have their lives, I have mine. I shouldn’t envy their lives any more than I highly doubt they envy mine.

I will instead rejoice in the abilities and accomplishments I’m fortunate to have, focus on this beautiful, sunshine-filled day, read what I can, and be very grateful for life itself, and any incremental progress along my spiritual path.

Releasing ourselves from desires and attachments, and this is what I’m really referring to, is the best way to fully harness the immense energy within us, for our good and those of others. When we are fixated on our perceived needs, we always feel lacking some thing or some person who will fulfill our needs. It’s all an illusion and greatly hinders our spiritual progress and our ability to live in the precious moments of the “now.” What do we really need? Certainly not more and more of this and that.