Insert clever title here. in The day to day

I never responded to my ex’s text last night about being mature adults and us all going to A’s games together. This morning I sent him an email. It basically said that hopefully one day we can all attend games together, but right now wasn’t that moment for me. That we already do separate things for the kids and that this isn’t any different. And that as long as we don’t make it a competition or disparage the other when they aren’t there, the kids will know that we both love and support them. Then I said that I didn’t have to back down from my opinion anymore because we aren’t together.

BOOM. Mic Drop.

Well I knew that last line would probably take him aback. He never responded to my email. I had also said as soon as I got the schedule I would let him know. Well after I had gotten to work, they emailed the schedule to everyone. He was on the email list from when we were still together and A played two years ago. He emailed me from the app they use to let me know he knew the schedule. Still never answered my email.

He came to pick the boys up from my work and I told him that if I was the first one to take him to his games, then we switched every other that the Saturday games would fall on his weekends. Then I also casually mentioned something that I had been meaning to say to him. He keeps harping on thinking B needs a better therapist or stronger medication. I told him that his therapist and his medication aren’t going to change B’s personality. He is who he is. The therapist and medication are there to help him cope. Then my ex goes on to mumble that after 17 years my personality changed. Something to that extent anyway, I couldn’t hear him well enough to get a direct quote. He said this because of my line in the email saying I didn’t have to back down anymore. I told him it wasn’t a personality change. We aren’t together anymore so I don’t have to compromise on everything like I did. I don’t have to keep the peace. Us as women so often back down just to keep the peace. We don’t want to fight. We just want our happy family. Well guess what, I don’t have to do that anymore. I don’t have anyone I have to make happy except myself! (And the kids, but that’s different. I still have to be a parent to them)

It’s so freeing to be able to do that and stick to my guns about it. I knew when he didn’t answer my email that he was upset. Well buddy, don’t think that’s stopping anytime soon!