Chicken Little in Current Events

Toni and I decided against the apartment we looked at the other day. The suite was nice. I liked it. The rest of the building had crackhouse vibes. We also suspect there is an insect problem. The landlord also had a problem with me. She kept giving me an attitude. She was straight up rude. What is your problem? kind of attitude. I think she thought I was drunk or high. I was running on three hours of sleep and was so tired it hurt. I’m self-aware enough to understand the optics of looking like a drunk native to her. It was that kind of area. It’s not my fault that the majority of homeless people that cause trouble look like me. I don’t take it to heart anymore when things like this happen. When businesses follow me around the stores and such I just make the best of it. They will ask me if I need help every two minutes. I just take it. It’s not my fault that the majority of people that steal from them look like. They have a right to protect their business. Anyway, the neighbourhood was not one I would take my niece for a walk in. I want an area that’s not rife with gangsta worshipping degenerates. Yes, I said that. I didn’t grow up in a ghetto with aspirations to become a ghetto princess. My role models were people I never wanted to be. Gangsta, thug losers who make bad choices and complain about it and blame the man.

It’s also not fair to Toni that she doesn’t get to shop around for better apartments. I’m off today and I’m dedicating it to looking for an apartment. I’ll also update my resume. I know I’ll need to apply for a second job eventually. Bev is quitting, I might get to garnish some of her wages. Speaking of work, it is going alright. I know what I’m doing for the most part. There is still lots to learn but the two basic functions I got down pat. I was officially useful for the majority of customers who asked me for help. It’s still menacing. I’m starting to learn a lot about the products along the way also. One day I’ll be a real boy. The other day, I don’t know what was going on with me everytime I got attention from another guy I immediately felt like a blushing bride. Like, no thank you. I ain’t got time for dat. Apparently, attention is my type?

I’m trying not to feel the pressure and panic. I have a week and a half to find a place. My mother offered me her basement if I need to wait until the end of April. I can tell that she really doesn’t want to do it. Toni and I think that I should take advantage of that offer. She’s involved now, my mother, so she keeps pushing her own panic and pressure on me. It’s not going to serve me to act and feel like chicken little. Trust me, it’s all I want to do. It’s my default setting. I want to freak out and sulk. This sucks, this absolutely sucks. Everything absolutely sucked the last few years. I’ve been at rock bottom. I’m not acting like a loser so I think people assume I’m comfortable down here. If I was a drunk or a junkie they would relate to me more. They would understand me more. I changed, they don’t recognize me. I don’t fit in their lives the way I used to. If there was an addiction problem that would make me make sense to them. Blah, anyway. Everybody is acting like I am supposed to have all the answers right now. Have it all figured out. The pressure is a lot but I can’t let myself buckle and fall apart. It’s not the content but the context that matters. I didn’t have to wait for a midlife crisis to learn that lesson thank god.

All Toni wants is a cheap place where she can save money. Of course, I know we’re in the middle of a global communist takeover and she won’t have the right to have private wealth soon enough. Our deputy minister even stated that she is trying to find a way to unlock people’s savings. They’re not pouring it into the economy enough and is frustrated that Canadians are saving money during a crisis. She’s the grandcaughter of an actual nazi from the actual holocaust who has a close relationship with George Soros, I don’t trust her for a second. I’ll invest in currency, eventually. I have to teach myself about that. I have a friend who keeps sending me information about it all. How it all works. I do know that our currency is fake. It was lent to us by the central banksters. We are the collateral and we have been burdened with paying the interest which is why we’re all unconstitutionally paying personal income tax. There is a way out of that indentureship, I will make my way around to learning how to do so soon enough. It feels like a complete waste of time as we’re being overthrown super easily. I just can’t tell if this global communist takeover is falling apart or coming together. Blah, I can’t put too much on my plate right now. Anyway, Toni’s only aspiration is growing a savings. I did that, it didn’t make me feel whole. Of course, I lost it and I’m not attached to money that way anymore. It’s just a tool. I have a friend who likes to complain about money being evil and making people corrupt. I’m that bully with unpalatable opinions and I’m loathed by all because I don’t believe things like money making people corrupt. Corrupt people make corrupt people. I don’t let people blame drugs for ruining lives instead of the addicts. I’ve been burned by them too many times. I don’t agree with the guns shoot people mentality either. People who shoot people. It low-key makes my eye twitch when I hear people blame society for obesity and not their own lifestyle choices. These commies want the government to come and take care of them. We’re all response-able adults. I’ve made the unconscious decision over a year ago that I don’t want to surround myself with people with such a deeply underdeveloped concept of personal responsibility. It’s painful to watch people just make excuses for everything all the time. Level up your consciousness!

Ok, I’m done my coffee. It’s a blessing that I’m locked out of my Facebook for a few days, so to speak. Can’t interact with anyone because of a post from December. This communist censorship has not fully demoralized me just yet. Youtube is censoring people who directly contradict the WHO. Aka, the Chinese Communist Party. You either know they’re protecting their narrative about their bioweapon or you don’t. Now Spotify is targetting misinformation. We’re not allowed to get discernment for ourselves, the only voice is the state. We have actual people with way too many chromosomes who think this is okay. They would be fully supportive of 1940 Germany 100% because they voluntarily brainwash themselves and believe this propaganda campaign. You are not worth your salt if you believe that your government and media would never lie to you. We have a responsibility to be intelligent but we have stupid people who are about to win stupid prizes because they voluntarily don’t question anything. Ever. They have no clue about anything. At all! They even experience anger and upset at people who do act intelligently and question the narratives. They’re too out of touch and too stupid to know it. It’s like arguing with a kid about Santa clause when these people try to argue and all their information comes from the news. Like, I can’t believe we have people who believe in that little gremlin Dr. Fauci. He doesn’t give medical advice he gives big pharma advice and lies through his teeth. These people just think he’s some hero. My word, humanity has a lot of work to do to redeem itself when we have people like that in society. I think it’s all about Asian-American violence now? Back to the race-baiting and these people will just eat it up. Ok, anyway. I gotta get on with it today.

Last updated March 19, 2021