Riding the ride in Life

And the rollercoaster ride continues. Bubba went back to Lucy less than a day after swearing he couldn’t go back ever again. Literally I could pound somebody’s head against the wall. I don’t know if it’s mine or his. Literally, he crawled back and begged forgiveness so he could come home. I asked him what he was apologizing for and he said for threatening to take the baby. I asked if she apologized for drinking, for hitting him, for cheating, for saying the baby wasn’t his, for siccing her drunk brother on him, for driving a wedge between him and his family….he just said, “Sissy, don’t go there, please.” My sister and Tootie aren’t speaking to him right now, or he’s not speaking to them, or Hell, I don’t know. Tootie told him what she thought of Lucy and he got mad. I told him he had to see our side of it. I explained that I went through exactly what Tootie is, as I watched his dad drink and beat his mom (my sister) and scream at him when he wouldn’t stop crying (he was about 18 mos old at the time). I had to watch it, be there when she cried, and then when she took him back, pretend that he was the greatest dad and husband ever. I told him it wasn’t fair to ask Tootie to do that. I also told him that we loved him and wanted the best for him and we felt that he wasn’t getting it. I went on to tell him that he deserved to be happy and loved, and I didn’t think he thought that. I also told him that loving those two girls wasn’t enough to stay with someone he doesn’t care about, trust, or even like. I ended the phone call pretty quickly after that. I don’t know what is going to happen. I feel like she is trying to drive a wedge between him and us. I’m working very hard not to have a lot of hate for her…but it’s hard.
To change the subject, it’s rapidly coming to the end of the school year. (17 school days left – 1 is field day, 1 is 4H Achievement Day, 2 are half days (the last two days of school), and 1 is end of year awards), so really only 12 classroom days left. In some ways I’m so ready for this year to end. It’s been stressful. I’m going to miss most of these kids a lot. Some, to be honest, I will be glad to see go. It’s been a rough year.
I started a diary over at easy diary (EWS from OD’s diary site). It looks a lot like OD, but it’s new, still having a few issues. I’m going to try it out and see how it goes. When I went to sign up, Dream Seeker was available, so I’m taking that as a good sign. I’ve written a first entry, but the search feature is one of the things he’s still working on, so I can’t find anyone else who is over there, yet. I don’t plan on jumping ship yet. It’s going to have to fix all the bugs and run smoothly for a while before I even consider it.
Ok, so I’ve fooled around enough. I have to go shovel out my living room and kitchen. My parents may stop by tomorrow and it just won’t do. Y’all have a good weekend! Thanks so much for the supportive notes on the Bubba situation. They really touched my heart.