Bone-weary & Pensively Phlegmatic in General Mental Anesthesia

Don’t let the title fool you. From one extreme to another. I go from having a fever of 103.7 in my former entry to a body temperature of 96.2 today.

LAST WEEK’S UPDATE:

All tests negative. Flu test negative, pneumonia, negative. All 3 #covid tests negative. I knew they would be, but now it’s confirmed. 

Diagnosis… just a virus.

No ear infection either, and I’ve lost even more weight.

Also, I can’t deal with the chronic fatigue until May. That’s when I can see my primary care Dr. ugh. Adrenal fatigue is most likely, but I’m not going to self diagnosis. Here’s what I’m going to do though… the only thing I CAN do.

I’m going to wear compression socks everyday. Knee high compression socks. I have some, but l’ll have to get more so I have enough to wash and wear daily. I know it’ll help with the tachycardia at least. My pain levels are so high, that despite my high threshold for pain, it puts a lot of strain on my heart which is why it’s constantly beating so fast. Two years ago this month, prior to being diagnosed with tachycardia, Dr’s told me I wasn’t long for this earth because of my high heart rate as a result of my pain levels and the fact that meds couldn’t bring my pain levels down, so I’m in a constant state of intense suffering. On one hand, I’m used to it, on the other, my heart rate is beating 120x a minute when I’m sitting doing nothing. That’s not good!

So, theoretically, compression socks should increase my energy levels a bit by increasing my blood flow which in turn I believe should increase muscle tissue oxygen saturation and lower my heart rate a bit, I think.

Considering my lack of concentration and constant brain fog, I don’t know if anything I say makes any sense. I’m really trying to help myself though. Maybe you read this and think: “Oh, he really put a lot of thought into this”. Try and understand, it takes me hours to post because I can’t think. I pause all the time because my brain just stops. The words blur on the screen and I have to look away. Sometimes, I repeat the same thing in my head over and over and over and over again and I don’t know why.  

This has been a worsening thing over the past year and I think it’s related to adrenal fatigue (or something in that family). It started when I stopped the Prednisone a year ago, but right around that time, my pulmonologist had me using (and still to this day) multiple inhalers and a nebulizer for severe eociniphilic asthma which are all steroids that effect the adrenal gland similarly to the way Prednisone did, and I’m really suffering as a result.

I actually just made an urgent care appointment tomorrow with a pa at a local dr. office affiliated with my primary cares office. I was going to go to urgent care tonight, that’s how bad I feel, but this will be better. If you’ve ever had Mono, that’s what this feels like.

And since I can’t exercise because I’ll break my spine, or my hip due to the osteoporosis (thank you Prednisone) I have to be creative in ways to bring up my energy levels.  

Considering how often I have to be my own Dr. It’d be nice if I could get paid for resolving my own issues. (albeit temporarily).

TODAY - FEB 19, 2021

Just got finished with the follow up appointment with the urgent care Dr. that I saw last week regarding fatigue 🥱.

I’m negative for Mono, but my labs were not good. There were A LOT of abnormalities. I won’t go into them all, but aside from low calcium and anemia etc… the biggest issue is that my platelet levels are extremely high.  

Normal range is: 147 - 365

I’m at 649

That’s concerning for several reasons.

1. It puts me at a high risk for developing a blood clot, but that shouldn’t happen because I’m on a blood thinner, so it’s very curious.

2. It could mean an infection, but I’ve tested negative for flu, pneumonia, ear infections, mono, covid… so the other big “c” word was floated around. (briefly). 🥺

3. It could just be the massive amount of inflammation in my body due to the extreme severity of my ulcerative colitis, though, as bad as it is, seems a bit excessive for that high a number.

4. Iron deficiency. Sure, I battle anemia, but this isn’t ‘just’ anemia. Even anemia plus the uc is questionable with a platelet number of 649.

Based on my lab / test results, I’m being treated for cfs or (chronic fatigue syndrome). It’s likely that I also have adrenal fatigue, but she first wants to start me on Cymbalta at 20mg and see how I do.

If that drug sounds familiar, when I was hospitalized 2 years ago this month, I was given Cymbalta and I injured myself because I was given too much of it which caused me to be overly groggy and I lost control of my faculties causing a fall and several major injuries.
Dr. is also concerned about my weight loss. 78lbs in the last year. 6 lbs in the last week. I’m hungry, but I just don’t want to eat, I simply don’t feel like it. I don’t want to. I’m hungry, but I’m not hungry. Sometimes it’s Ulcerative Colitis pain, sometimes I just don’t care. She threatened to put me on meds to get me to eat if I don’t gain weight. She wants me to drink Ensure or Boost protein shakes, she even recommended I eat more red meat. I told you.... Some of my numbers were WAY off.

I’ve been wearing compression socks voluntarily (as mentioned previously) mostly to help with my tachycardia and now I absolutely HAVE to wear them to lower any increased risk of blood clots! Wth is going on man??? Did the Xarelto suddenly and somehow stop working? Is that even possible? Now I have to have that conversation with my pulmonologist.

I just want to snap out of this ‘fog’. I want my brain to work again, to wake up. I’m tired of being so tired, too tired to move, too tired to think, too tired to care about anything.

Truth is… I’m trying. I don’t know why, I honestly don’t. I’m not someone that is afraid to ask for help, that’s why I went to urgent care in the first place, but at the same time… I really don’t give a crap anymore; take that as you will.  

I’m just so very tired.

At least my sock game is strong.

By the way… since wearing the compression socks, my energy levels haven’t increased at all, however, my average resting heart rate has dropped about 20 - 25 bpm.

Not easy to find silver linings these days.

I barely care enough to share this link, but I’m not afraid to ask for help… well, not anymore.

Last updated February 20, 2021