Grades coming in... in The Daily (2014)

The real action is one entry back in the friends only book. But, I have gotten two of my final grades back… an A- in my Oral history Practicum and (unsurprisingly) a C- in Math 190…. I am not super pleased about the former of those marks, but not terribly surprised. I know I could have done better if I was doing this on my own and I am upset because I know that we lost a tonne of marks because that final project was shit. If I had been doing it on my own, that would have been an A. Oh well. An A- isn't bad.

I hate looking at what the last couple semesters of anxiety and depression and mental health problems has done to my Cumulative GPA.. I went from a 3.75 to a 3.54 (and this is going to drop further once my GIS mark comes in). I think my upper division GPA is higher though… I have nothing below a B+ in an upper division course, and the majority at the in the A range.

Okay, but, really, I think the bigger issue here that I need to address is why I am so hung up on grades. I know that I have a good enough GPA to have a decent pick of grad schools. And that is all that matter really. And I probably won't be picking /the best/ grad school because I have to consider Liz's willingness to pick up and move and what we can afford. So, I have what I need. So, why is it is that I am allowing myself to be so disappointed in myself for struggling at a time when I have been struggling very badly emotionally and still maintaining decent grades? I have such a strong need for external gratification, and it isn't terrible healthy.