"LIKE I'VE LOVED YOU" in "RESTLESS: POETICALLY-SPEAKING"

I’ve decided to keep my old vow
that I shall never love
anyone like I’ve loved you.
No, please don’t say ‘wow’.
I don’t mean it as a compliment.
There’s still a lot about me, oblivious to you.

For starters,
I’ll always be more critical.
I’ll silently second guess
instead of blindly following my heart,
while abandoning my head behind.

As I watch what he does
Instead of just listening to what he says,
I’ll calculate and compare
before I decide to let him in and stay
and consider him okay.

I don’t want to love him
like I’ve ever loved you.
Innocent, too trusting,
too patiently waiting,
hanging on to your every word
like a daydreamer enchanted
by a favourite poet of hers,
a hopeless romantic,
before reality turned her heart
like the glacier in the Antarctic.

I won’t say those three sacred words
if he won’t say them first.
Well, even if he does,
his actions must speak louder,
based on the sound advice from my late father.

Anyone can profess their love for you,
like actors in Hollywood,
or musicians to complete their tunes.
It’s just for show, not really true.

So, I’ll never love anyone anymore
as I’ve loved you.
You are beyond compare.
I know it’s unfair.
We were different back then.
Like seasons, we’ve also changed.

No worries, you can be off the hook.
I must be fully responsible for my own feelings.
I have to be independent.
Never again will I love anyone like I’ve loved you
because I’ll be damned if I do!

R.