Sorry I haven't written in a while... in Roundtrip Ticket to Paradise 2
- May 19, 2014, 9:46 p.m.
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Sorry I haven't written in here in a while... most of my writing (well, actually all of my writing) I've done has been comments on others' threads in the Fetlife Asperger forums (see the list one entry back). Been helping out, offering empathy and/or advice on threads everywhere from G to X/NC-17, while also trying to learn more about Asperger and hopefully how to turn what I perceive as the liabilities I experience from it into assets.
On a somewhat related note, had a non-obvious connection occur to me yesterday. As most may know, I experienced systematic emotional abuse starting at home at age late-8 in late spring 1971 at the hands of my mother, and beginning at school in fall 1975 at the hands of a teacher (and following his example, some of my classmates).
I heard or read somewhere that some such Survivors tend to gravitate towards Protector-type jobs, and I see such in myself: waiter (making sure folks get fed good food), taxi driver (transporting someone safely from one place to another - and, in my cab, waiting to see that they get inside their destination), wanting to become an Impact Model Mugging instructor (owing to two wipeouts on the ice with broken bones, probably no longer doable owing to the fact I'd be taking full-throttle shots from students, even though I would be padded), wanting to become a bus driver (again, safe transportation).
Outside of work, on several occasions I have shied off clowns who were pestering women who obviously weren't in a position to defend themselves.
I am curious: do such Survivors who grow up to be Protectors however specifically not include themselves in the group of people they should protect? I've noticed that in myself, given self-sabotaging activities such as disappearing inside a bottle for days on end. Of course, the Asperger trait of isolationism (having difficulties recognizing social cues and responding appropriately to them, so just spending time alone or hibernating instead) doesn't help.
Hmm...
That may be something to explore at a future workshop.
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