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In the Graveyard Again in Ground Control

  • Nov. 6, 2020, 4:22 p.m.
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Shift, that is, for four weeks. We concluded our first day of night this morning. I powered through it and the work wasn’t bad at all. I’m thankful, though, as due to the spacing of our breaks, I got to watch the gap in Georgia narrow until it completely disappeared. I saw Pennsylvania change over, too. I had been so busy watching Georgia that it blew me out of the water. I’m taking a celebratory bubble bath at the moment, something I wouldn’t have been able to do two days ago due to, without exaggeration, vomit-inducing stress.

The bath is actually more because the room we were working from has no air circulation at all, so the sweat was real and my hair is an oil slick. Also because my knee–that took a harsh scraping a month or more ago–is still killing me. I fell off my scooter onto asphalt going 9mph directly into my knee… I could see each individual hair follicle in the wound as it bled and scabbed and peeled again and again. The skin finally healed over but now there is a large patch of dark blood blistering where the deepest part of the wound was. It probably needs ice more than heat, but we’ll see. It’s funny, though. The outer skin stings if you touch it as if it’s sunburned (but not PEAK sunburn badly.)

Anyway, I’m feeling good. I thought I’d try to write something if even really basic. I never do well with nojomo no matter who gets the prompts together.

You know what’s funny, I was doing a max lair raid in the new DLC content for Pokemon Sword/Shield two days ago (I think, I can’t keep track of what day it is even without being on overnights) and managed to catch a shiny Politoed. I was in the middle of suppressing a headache and nausea over election maps. Honestly, I was out of it enough to be staring through the tv, paying just enough attention to make coherent decisions.

Anyway, I got to the end, threw a master ball at the legendary, caught it, and when it came time to pick a Pokemon from the cave to keep (you only get one) the freakin politoed was shiny, so I had to take him over the master ball legendary. That shiny, though… Made me feel so happy. He’s the brightest light blue and magenta instead of green and pale yellow. I had this weird talk with my conscience about it… It just felt like a strange, comforting sign. Something trying to get at me through the thing that had my current focus to communicate that I shouldn’t lose heart.

I wish it was drugs, but no, I’m just a kid inside.

I think I was right, though. I feel a massive weight off me today, watching things play out. I think I’ll name that shiny something corny and hallmark like “Hope 2020.” I’ll cherish him, regardless… I never even liked Politoed that much.

I’m inspired though. I feel able to get back stable on my medicines. I think I’ll do that tonight… Tomorning. I read advice to an egg earlier from a trans individual that said they transitioned at the age of 72. That was really damn inspiring, too. Those are the stories that get me going.

Oh, and they’re playing Christmas music over the store radio, finally, and the first song I heard happened to be my favorite classic, Carol of the Bells. It was a really damn good night.


Last updated November 06, 2020


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