Confirmed in Journal

  • Oct. 19, 2020, 9:34 p.m.
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  • Public

I haven’t seen or spoken to my mom at all in the last 2 months- since the beginning of September- but 3 times.
All 3 times, she has acted incredibly strange.
The first time was at my cousin’s bridal shower. Well, his fiance’s bridal shower. I greeted her and even sat next her, asked her how she was and tried to make conversation. But she barely said a word to me. I think she might’ve said “Good” or something in response, but I’m not sure. She wasn’t looking at me. She didn’t look at me the entire time I was there. She just looked at my son occasionally with a sad, vacant expression.
I told my husband about this, which he responded to with a mild acceptance but I could tell he didn’t quite believe me. I think he was still not convinced of everything that I was telling him about my mother and my childhood.
But.
We were both at DH’s Grandmother’s memorial and my mom showed up there. She acted even more strangely at that event. She showed up, stood about 15 feet away, and stared at us awkwardly. Or rather, she stared at my son. She talked to a few acquaintances, but it was so painfully awkward that they excused themselves to go talk to the hosts, leaving just me, DH, our son, and my mom who was still about 15 feet away. I again tried to ask her some questions and be nice. She didn’t answer. Just made a very weird, sad, vacant expression. Eventually she walked away. When she left, she never told me or even looked at me. I just saw her leaving. When I saw her heading out, I said good-bye to her, but she said nothing to me. I guess she never greeted me, either so I guess I shouldn’t have expected her to say good-bye.
It was a relief, really, that she decided to show up at DH’s family thing and be weird publicly. Then, at least, my husband can see for himself how she is acting. It’s not just me.
The third time I’ve seen my mom was at my cousin’s wedding. This was probably what really cemented my decision to be sure that she is choosing to behave this way.
Dh, our son, and I, went to the wedding and when we got there, had a good ole’ chat with my brother and his wife. We caught up and joked and smiled and looked at my cute as all get out baby. It was great. We greeted and were greeted by various family members, and long-lost friends from decades ago. Both of my parents were there, but walked by without a glance.
At the reception, DH and I stood talking to my grandma for several minutes before both my parents came and sat next to her. Neither of my parents spoke to me.
My dad asked DH how much our son weighed now. That was it.
When we left, I came to tell them good-bye. Mom never looked at me, and dad gave me a disgusted look. Not before looking around, though, to see if anyone was watching.
Whatever.
I guess that’s all I needed to know.


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