Ups Downs Strange in Book Seven: Reconstruction 2020

Writing more because I can. Sorry to bombard the space so much.

Just had depositions on Domestic Abuse. Big massive brute of a guy and this would be his third conviction for it if there is a conviction. And… it is something I truly don’t understand. And the humor, the tragedy… is that gender “experts” believe the reason I don’t understand is the same reason as to why these men find themselves successfully getting relationships in the first place. A MAN is confident in his masculinity and shows off how masculine he is and that attracts women. And part of that masculinity is about being a man IN CONTROL and so when his woman starts getting out of line he has to exert that CONTROL. Like… this guy? Not that attractive. Just large. Over six feet tall. Big hands. He was having an affair, cheating on his wife. So… brute with an abusive past… juggling two women. His wife found out and they got into an argument, he breaks her nose.

And… grump. The whole damned thing just… yeah. GRUMP. This violent, angry, criminal man has no trouble finding women. There’s no justice in this world.

SPEAKING of justice…

The Iowa Supreme Court sent out additional COVID protocols. GOOD! Too many of the people in this county would rather listen to the fucking governor than the CDC! SO NO THANK YOU to “just trusting them to do shit right.” So of course it says things like “If you have a fever and a positive diagnosis, stay home and remain there until 14 days after your fever stops. If you have a fever but no diagnosis, get tested. If you have gotten tested but don’t have the results, stay home until the results come in. If someone in your house has a positive COVID diagnosis; stay home for 14 days AFTER their fever stops. If you are in contact with a person with a positive COVID diagnosis, stay home for 14 days.”

You’d think that this was all easy, simple, no duh shit. IF there is a pandemic, STOP spreading it. Yeah?

Conservatives in our office freaked out and started bitching that “this (would) lead to shutting everything down again!” Well… I’m thinking NOT since I have seven trials on Thursday and we have two jury trials going next week. And one of those jury trials relies on calling a witness whose SON was diagnosed with COVID on the 18th. And we’re just… going ahead. SO.... no. We’re not going to all just shut down. We’re not even doing the specific minimums required to stop the spread. So how about all of you go fuck yourselves since (and this is true) the current local Conservative Mantra about COVID? “Well, we’re all going to get it eventually. So what’s the use?”

AUGH… I worked through lunch. YES I started the day starving; no that didn’t go away. But with depositions I had to prepare shit over the noon hour. So now, I’m hungry.

As I was experiencing that, Remus started texting me pictures of him and the daughter. Silly photos. Just a “How’re you doing, Chris? Here’s sillies for laughs!” Then Victoria texted me a meme about being a dorky, awkward boy. lol. It’s all right. She does the same to Remus so I’m not offended. But I think it is funny that I was all “I’m just… going to withdraw.” And they both reached out to me.

Then I got a text from my mom. And here’s me being petty:
My grandfather had two sons. The sons grew up and got married. They have stayed married and have each celebrated 40 years of marriage. Each marriage produced two offspring. Me and my brother; and my Boy Cousin and Girl Cousin. My brother got married in 2005 and had a daughter in 2014. I got married in 2011 and separated in 2020. My Girl Cousin got married in 2014 and had a son in 2018. My Boy Cousin got married in 2017 and he and his wife are at the hospital right now having their first child. And I should be ecstatic for them. And part of me is! This is going to be awesome and amazing and wonderful! And when we all get together there will be Niece (X) and Child (X minus Four) and Baby (X minus six) And such wonderful and joyful and happy gatherings. And I am excited for that and it will be really cool. But right now? I’m just… not in that headspace, y’know? Right now I’m in the headspace of 9, 4, 3. Nine years of marriage, baby to brother. Four years of marriage, baby to Girl. Three years of marriage, baby to boy. I was married for 9 years. I mean, technically I’m still married. Best I’ve got is that sometimes I hang out with my FWB’s kids.

Well, I’ve depressed myself again. THE FOLLOWING IS FROM A LIST CALLED

20 THINGS WOMEN WISH MEN DID IN BED

(Even though there are actually only 14 things on the list)
Lady readers, what do you think? For a lot of these, I’d say “it depends on the woman, therefore it is important to communicate with your partner about your needs, wants, and desires.”

(1) “Fucking make some noise. Moan, talk dirty, growl, whatever. This isn’t your mom’s basement.”
(2) “Kiss my neck and ears. It gives me goosebumps in the best way.”
(3) “Don’t rush foreplay. Going straight to tits or my clit actually slows things down. Kiss my neck, run your fingertips down my spine, slowly tease your hand up and down, then a bit higher up my thigh. Take the time to get my engine warmed up and running before you try to take me out for a ride.”
(4) “I’ve always wanted a guy to shove me up against a wall and make out with me, but no one ever has.”
(5) “If a girl says don’t stop, for the love of god, don’t stop. Don’t do anything differently than what you were doing when she said don’t stop. Don’t slow down or speed up or go harder. Just do it the exact way you were.”
(6) “Don’t get upset if a girl starts playing with herself while you’re having sex. It’s a good thing.”
(7) “Let me undress you as part of foreplay! We start to get heated and then BAM — you’re naked?! I like the tease of it all!”
(8) “Wash their hands before they start wiggling fingers down there.”
(9) “Have lube handy, and don’t judge women or take it personally if they can’t get very wet. Many women struggle to get super wet all the time. Lube makes everything better.”
(10) “Suck on my clit. Don’t just lick it; suck on it like you’re trying to give it a hickey. Instant orgasm.”
(11) “Snuggle after sex.”
(12) “Slow down! Seriously, we don’t like the rabbit sex. Calm the fuck down and give us some other motion besides pumping in and out at maximum speed.”
(13) “The clit is your best friend. Most women can’t come from penis-in-vagina alone. Pay lots of attention to that pleasure center — lick, kiss, rub, and worship that thing.”
(14) “Not many guys have done this, and I’ve expressed that I like it but I love ‘dirty talk’. As in “you like that baby?” Or “want me to fuck you harder?” or “you taste/feel so good” etc. it turns me on SO much more and faster.”