Our new normal in Bittersweet

  • Sept. 16, 2020, 1:27 p.m.
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  • Public

Well im adjusting i guess. Im not even sure to what, But i feel that in transition phase. My husband says im much happier over all. I dont even feel super happy overall. But peaceful i guess. I am having more moments where i Laugh. You gotta understand for someone who is a medicated bipolar. Your meds keep you just fine. You dont get a lot of excitement feelings and likewise not the critical lows that lead to suicide attempts. Yes been there. Im going on 2 years “clean” from an attempt. So 90% of the time, i feel just fine. Not great, or bad. But Just fine. Its something i complained to my therapist about. How do you adjust to feeling just fine. And she said you eventually do. And i guess i am.

As far as the house. Things are starting to come together. Yesterday we had a couch and coffee table delivered. Its not the set i wanted. But they are more comfortable then the ones i wanted. Its brown leather couch and a cream wood with brown wood top coffee table iwth a lift top. Have you seen a lift top coffee table. Its neat. The lid actually lifts up so you can use it as a computer table, Or in our case. We eat at it. Anyway we got that. Then my mother in law took me back to the furniture store and bought us 2 more mattresses ( shes bought 4 of the 6) and a side table. Its an 84 inch long shelving unit. I prefer vertical BUT ill take the horizontal in the living room. Its an under the tv table. Its pure white though. And i do prefer cream haha. But we think it wont be so bad. It may look odd having cream AND white and brown and grey? Maybe. I dont know. Anyway the new couch is large and i put my cowboy blanket on the back.
(cowboy refresher) I refer to all my blankets by their pattern names.
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So the new side table is going to go along our 10 ft long “blank wall” where im putting my paintings.its only 16 inches wide, so shouldent be too obstructive. And now we have a sofa and a loveseat in the living room, so we have enough seating for a chunk of us lol. At least the 3 adults are comfortable. Kids mainly stay in the kid side. I still need quite a bit. I need some coffee tables for storage and whatnot. And a vertical book shelf. Then for the kitchen i need the island and a kitchen table. I found a cute corner table that i think will work. Its in cream and grey brown lol… Yes thats my theme. Im using color pops in my blankets. Anyway that will finish off the kitchen. For the kids space. I found a square cube shelf at ikea. Its like 6 squares squared. Its bigger then the walmart ones. Its 72 inches tall anyway. They have a large wall in there and i want that shelf on the wall. Its only 200 or so. Then the kids space will be done. It will give all the storage/sorting ability for their hobbies, school supplies, books ect.I found a desk attachment too, That you can fold open a desk, or lay it flat. I want that in there for them too on the big shelf. I think they need around 400 dollars in shelving. Not bad you know… The kitchen needs around 1K. Living room needs around 200. Then after that. Its my bedroom that i want to do. I found a bedroom set for around 1500. Its just going to take quite a while to piece it all together Unless i buck hard and really start to push to sell hand made items again. Im working on it lol. But im also still hungup on making these blankets. I did do a bit in the last month. Which is helpful.

So update on my latest blanket. Self Checks.
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My sons color choices are bright to say the least lol.
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Ok time to school the children.


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