cold. and. in 2007: March 1: transferred fom FOD

if someone has one concussion. then no. they have one. concussion. obviously. no what i’m saying is. each concussion is different.
so. i apologise. if, on here or fb. i come off as cold. i’m sorry in advance. i’m recovering from a tbi.
no but i’ve also been physically cold. the temp. change thing again. now i’m someone who gets cold fairly easily..................no but um. i don’t usually. have to. put more blankets around me before i go to sleep in my bed at my mom’s. in the summer. and i did that. fri. morning. and by ‘morning’ i mean when it’s still dark out.
yeah so that’s new. oh i also got a bit of vertigo last wk. oh fuk. and i cannot hear. as well. well. not that my hearing was great before, the head injury. but now it’s like. i feel like i’m underwater. and i’ve checked for wax..................but there’s not much in there from what i can tell. i was very careful when i checked. and it’s more my right ear then left. which is weird. and interesting bc. that’s the ear i um. hear better out of. i haven’t lost my sense of taste/smell yet and i might not. that’s what happened w/ my first concussion. oh but here’s something interesting: back when i got my first concussion jan. of 2018. well i got nerve damage regarding a nerve. in my well. underarm. on my left side. and that’s why. for so long i’d turn away, from people when sitting cause it would hurt like hell. well since mon. i don’t have that anymore.
my period. actually has been fairly normal. well i sustained the. um. tbi [pretty sure i got a tbi] on mon. got my period wed. yeah my period was fairly easy. well w/ my first concussion. i remember, vaguely. one month it wasn’t. it was horrible. yeah w/ my first one. and i don’t remember this too well. but. the night i got it. i um. got TMI sick that night. whereas on.................er last mon. i got ‘TMI sick’ in the ladies’ rm. of the store. so..................i guess what i’m saying. is this time. it um. it happened quicker.
it’s fun being a peach. oh yeah. oh i have a new bruise. small, red, lower back left. my knee weirdly enough doesn’t look bruised. i have a blue bruise near my left. shoulder. and some on my left temple. small. but those are brown and have been there for awhile. long time.
oh i had the weird pain thing. where i’m in pain but also um. nauseaus.
and. i’m really. damn irritable. i’m pretty short-fused to begin w/. so. but irritable to the point where i start crying. like omygod.
and it’s weird. cause i’m usually a quiet, really sweet, demure person. and sad. it’s also sad.
but at the same time. i feel. normal. like this didn’t happen like i don’t have a tbi. but i know differently.
so. i’m depressed. not like emotionally. that sounds weird. no but. what i’m saying. is my being depressed. is due to the tbi. and i’m just. sad lately.
my memory. and language. is different. like i’ll think of the moon and think ‘luna’ which is spanish for ‘moon’.
although. the fact that i think that. shows how intelligent. i am.
i’m injured not stupid.
i feel like recovery is just starting out. well. that’s bc it is.
there was time. on last mon. for me to grab onto the van prior to my having passed out...............but the van didn’t stop.
but the second time. i fell. like cause i remember the median. there wasn’t much, if anything. to grab onto.
usually. the sound of water running from a faucet doesn’t bother me. but the other day. when my mom had the faucet on. the sound bothered me.
i’m not super emotional. which is weird bc usually. i’m a pretty emotional person. oh yeah. i have a tbi. most certainly. had? an recovering from? yes. am recovering from.
i haven’t really had, much of an ep. er ap. appetite, lately. that’s changed.
my eyes look different. actually. they look vacant the pupils. still pretty. i have green eyes. [well hazel actually.].
idinno maybe emptiness can be pretty? really makin an effort to be positive but. ...........fuk. oh. i think i get it. it’s kindof like the concept of ‘less is more’. there we go.
come look at the freak. i have always liked circuses. sans animals cause i love. animals i do remember this fact [btw i’m a little fuked up as i’m typing this. for reasons having nothing to do w/ a tbi] about myself. even though i don’t like. connect to it. derealisation.
oh yeah so. the subdural hemotema [sp?] i’d mentioned prior to this entry. well that. involves dura matter of course. and it should go away er. i mean get better. 20 days from last mon. that’s um almost 3 wks. it’s one of 3 membranes that. covers the spinal column. er cord spinal cord. the other is the. epidural. yes just like the thing........................no. not just like the. ok so. sorry the only similarity between that. and the injection/drug they give some pregnant ladies. is the word ‘epidural’ far as i know. [i’ve never been.]. the other one is.................i forgot.
well. if that’s the only dural hemotema i have. then i have 2 more....................membranes, that’s the word. to help w/ the recovery process. cause. apparently and i only know this. cause last time [pretty sure. i got one] i got a concussion. well i was v. recently looking up my entries from that time. and the. uninjured parts of the brain. will work to help, the injured parts. i think i have csf leakage. ew sorry. csf = cerebral spinal fluid. my ears/eyes aren’t bruised and my nose isn’t running, as of yet. in the event of tbis. that’s a sign of csf leakage. the nose running at least.
i haven’t had any thunderclaps yet. but i expect i might at some point.
right so thurs. night i baked. at my mom’s and as when i bake i listen to diana krall. love her. and i don’t recall the music sounding any different then before, this more recent tbi. [different how?] i don’t know. no well w/ my last, tbi. er the first one i mean sorry. back in jan. 2018. music sounded. different.
um.