ellipsis in poetry

sometimes I think about
that day in L.A.
when a girl knocked on the door
of the office that I worked for
thinking it was another place
and when I informed her
of her being misinformed
she took my hand and
I think by means of apology
she read my palm

and yes I'm a skeptic
but I'm also real curious
about all the ways human nature shakes out
so I asked her
"what did you see?"

and she looked up at me
most women have to look up at me
I'm sort of a big shambling thing
she looked up at me
a little sad and said
"you're going to be a great success..."

and she trailed off like that
she trailed off like a sentence
trailing off with a pregnant ellipsis
"but?"

"but not for a long time"

sometimes I think about it
and I wonder
has it been long enough?

sometimes I think about
that night in L.A.
when a pinched nerve went into spasm
and I thought I was having a heart attack
and as I laid there in the living room
trying to talk myself out of it
in and out of it
shaking in the night there

and for some goddamned reason
the neighbors were playing
CCR's "Fortunate Son" on repeat
maybe it was only three or four times
but in my memory's eye
it felt like it was for hours

it ain't me
it ain't me
I ain't no fortunate son

it ain't me
it ain't me
I ain't no fortunate one

as I laid there in my living room
in a shabby part of Los Angeles
trying to talk myself out
of believing I was dying
and having an anxious breakdown
on top of everything else

over the years I've come to terms
with the fact that my back
is just mangled and tangled to bits
spaced out and bulging
like a pregnant ellipsis
but still

sometimes I think about it
and I wonder
has it been long enough?