I Had It in Thirty-Five

There’s a more positive entry one back if you want to skip this one.

I have literally cooked 90% of the meals for the last 6 weeks. Done most of the laundry and dishes. I have tended to, fed, watered and gave attention to all 10 animals.

I spent about 2 hours outside rinsing the pine and pee from the rats’ fleece so I could clean their cages. I threw that in the washer to finish cleaning it with vinegar.

This whole time Randy was sitting there playing video games. He’s loaded and unloaded the dishwasher a few times but I’ve had to ask him. Or take out the trash. I have to ask him every time. Usually he’ll say yeah in a minute and then doesn’t do it. So I go to take it out and he’s like I said I’d do it (two hours ago). So I just walk past him and take the damn thing out myself.

Like the other day I told him to make dinner because I wasn’t going to. He was soooooo hungry. But two hours later, guess what? No dinner. So when I asked him what he was making, he just sighed and so I got up and made dinner.

I told him I’m officially off the clock for the next two weeks. I was visibly upset when I finished putting the fleece to wash and he tried to hug and kiss me. I just looked him dead in the eye and said

“I’m fucking tired.
I need help from you.
I’ve done all the cooking and caring for the animals and YOU need to limit your time on the PlayStation.
I shouldn’t even have to ask.
I know you’re tired and hurting, but how do you think I fucking feel.”

And then I walked away because I was angry crying. He’s currently cleaning the kitchen.

I hate that it always comes back to this particular scenario. It has been a LOOONNNGGGG time since it’s gotten to this point (like it happened in 2014 the last time).

I am definitely partially to blame because I was babying him because his wrist was literally swollen triple is size a few weeks ago. But it has gotten better and it’s at the slight annoyance stage.

Ugh. It doesn’t help that I’m on my period so my temper is already short. I’m not the kind of person to blame my temper on anything though, because I know I have one. It’s just a lot shorter during this time of the month lol.

FML.