greetings from BedlamVille in shiny things

It's that time again. Graduation application time. In which we send out emails to approximately 394,032 students who have applied to graduate in May letting them know they are missing all manner of requirements --- and then the screeching and wailing begins!! "Nobody toooooold me!!! I didn't knoooooooow!!!!" and they blame us and they blame their advisors and they weep and wail and threaten as I sit here gazing at the audits we sent them last semester that outlined exactly what it is that they are now missing because they never did do it.

Well, I do exaggerate of course. It's more like 300 and a whole lot more of them are all set to graduate than aren't. It's the "aren'ts" that are killing us. Especially me. Mr. Organized got called up for jury duty, and I'm actually feeling very envious. Because he's not here!!

This is my excuse for totally neglecting PB. We've been working on applications for a solid month, and it is grueling and I am keeling over by the end of the day and too brain-dead to read or write or do much other than drink beer and watch TV. (We're finally watching Breaking Bad!! I LOVE it!!!)

The good thing is that we've got the first round of them done and the emails sent-- the emails that either say "Congratulations!!" or "You're not graduating, loooooooser!". The next round is not so urgent because that bunch has applied late. Not that "applying late" has any meaning at all. The deadline was February 14. The next week we got 45 more. And each week after that we've gotten at least 20 more. It's the usual deadline. You better not miss it!!! But if you do, hey, there are no repercussions whatsoever!! I am good with sending their emails whenever I get around to it, though. Take that, late applicant!!

So I've been in a mad whirl of emails and phonecalls and students coming by and parents calling because their little darlings are on the Chancellors List and could not possibly be short 6 hours of electives to meet the minimum number of hours they have to have to graduate.... apparently being on the Chancellors List does not require the ability to add, or to read and comprehend since we sent her an audit saying she had to have six hours of electives for the minimum last semester. SIGH.

At least I have had some Aggravation Receptionist amusement today. She needed to request a file from the Records Center, which is where Baker B works and where files get sent after a certain time to await destruction. She comes in my office and asks if Baker B's phone number has changed. I say, no, it's the same number it's always been.

"I keep calling it, but a machine answers! It sounds like your husband's voice, though!"

"........." "................." "........................ummmm, that's the... answering machine, AR. You just need to.... leave a message."

She did at least add that she'd tried and it kept cutting her off, but.... but... wouldn't you just say their answering machine didn't seem to be working?!? Not marvel about how a mysterious machine voice that might be my husband kept answering when she called??? I often leave messages on that machine, incidentally, and have never had it cut me off. I wish I could recreate the dippy blank gaze along with the conversation.

Fortunately for AR she is prettier than Homer, but the stare is very similar.

And now it's back to the grueling grind for me.