ankle. and um so today. in 2007: March 1: transferred fom FOD

so. i’m going. to type up a note for my mom’s good friend Karen A. [we know a few ‘karens’] in regards. to her mom not being w/ us anymore. karen’s. we’ve known Karen forever.........and come to think of it i don’t ever remember not. knowing her they met when they were in college in the ‘70’s so. yeah when my mom told me. on fri. er thurs. i mean sorry. yes on thurs. about karen’s mom i asked ‘what would karen want?’ cause you know. people want different things during difficult times. and my mom went ‘i don’t know’ ok. but ya know i was thinking about it today. and everyone likes cards. Karen’s awesome one of the coolest people i’ve ever met/known. and she knows that cause i’ve told her.
so today. well i was allowed my full 5 hrs. out which wow that’s amazing. that sounds. idinno sarcastic or w/e and.........yeah. a bit. [oh yeah more on this in an upcoming entry] no it was nice. so at the dollar store i got tape. for my ankle cause ya know what? this is the 3rd damn day. er...........no wait. 5th. my memory lately.......... and it’s really starting to get to me. [well yeah.]. um. over the weekend i kept it up. and it’s hard cause there’s not much else i can do. and i’m not a patient person at all so. um. oh so i also got chai. from starbucks not. for my ankle although it has caffeine in it so. i guess indirectly...........yeah. god it was fukin delicious. i’m like ‘i’ma get it cause i fukin deserve it and i’m not feeling well’ so. there we go. omygod it was so good and it helped. to calm me down. i love warm things. the starbucks people are so nice. it took me like 2 mins. to think of the word ‘receipt’ but the lady was really patient.
i. was in pain today i mean. physical pain but not for like. a long period of time. often, though. yes i would say ‘often’. short, but often. i like that ‘short but often’. anyway. but. so i got back to the house at. um god when was that? uh.................4? 4:10? and so for a couple of hrs. after. i wasn’t really in pain. and like i can deal w/ pain it’s just. it doesn’t help my already drained state ya know?
yeah so on fri. well in the kitchen they [cause again it’s not actually ‘my’ house] had a few tylonel left in the bottle. [sorry i realise i haven’t clarified who ‘they’ are. the couple i live w/] and i took 2. and god i calmed down right away. and actually. honestly.......i was thinking of buying some today but again. that’s a terrible idea for someone like me. someone who has depression. so needless to say [or maybe not] i didn’t get any.
not too much happened today. which was nice.
as i’ve said. i’m just so drained and i’m pretty sure i know why. i just. ya know i don’t really want to analyse that. i just want to. veg out. and the more i think about stuff the more difficult it is to do so. but i get there eventually. it’s like an orgasm i’ve found: if people wait for it. and focus on it it doesn’t well. um come. so sometimes. focusing doesn’t help. i love that word ‘orgasm’. i do love that word.
um. btw my valentine’s day was nice. i was at my mom’s we watched tv that night as usual. and uh oh. i had this super cool bus driver. he was tall not that. that has anything to do w/ someone’s personality i just happened to notice. no i like/d him. he wasn’t pushy or super talkative. no he was cool. like i said.