Overdue in The Crimson Permanent Assurance

I know this entry is long overdue. I have been so busy at work, I haven't had a "down day" in weeks, work has been insane. And that is a lot of what has been going on. I have been working 5 months doing a job that I haven't been paid for, on promises that I would have my raise eventually, some day. I just got fed up with it. The only reason I put up with it for so long was that I have valued the personal relationships that I forged doing this job, but everyone that I've loved and become attached to has quit and I'm left wondering why I am working this hard for less pay than I've earned. This week I took the plunge and applied for the same position I have been doing but with another account. I just have to get through the background check process which was a pain in the ass last time because all of my previous jobs were independent contractor positions where they could never get anyone on the phone to verify my employment. I've been working for this company for almost 2 years, hopefully it won't be as much of an issue but there's no accounting for bullshit. It happens. If everything goes well, I will start my new job doing exactly what I am doing now on the same shift for more pay at the start of May. I am not counting any chickens before they hatch, but I literally have nothing to lose at this point. I work so hard and my bosses have not acknowledged this at all, in any way. I'm so tired of it. I had an interview Thursday morning and it wasn't so much an interview as "we have heard good things about you" and seeing if I had any questions about the job. It's just all formalities at this point, but again, no counting chicks. Either way, it will be fine. I just hope everything works out.

On the health front, everything is OK. I feel almost completely back to normal. I don't have any issues eating anymore, except for nuts or really tough meat. I love my teeth at this point. There is an amazing community out there that is so positive and helpful and reassuring for people who have gone through the process of getting dentures at a young age. I don't feel any shame anymore about it, which is such a big change from three months ago when I spent nights crying in bed because I was so ashamed of my mouth. I don't even care anymore. I feel so much better health-wise. I love putting on makeup and smiling. I didn't have any anxiety over whether I would be judged for terrible teeth at my interview yesterday, I just felt confident. It's almost too strange, not having those feelings of fear. Strange in a good way. It's interesting how some people have noticed right away that something is different and some people have just said "There is something different about you, but I don't know what it is." Eleni, my niece, walked in one day and said right away, "Your teeth! They look amazing!" And Chantal's mom the other day said "There is something different about you but I can't put my finger on it." I haven't had any issues for awhile, no pain, no discomfort, it's like life has returned but without drama. At least, about that.

I feel like the un-cool kid on the block because everyone I love has been quitting alcohol and I am still weekend drinking strong. I don't want to talk about it much because I don't want to trigger anyone, but I did cut back a bit on how MUCH I was drinking on Saturdays and Sundays and that has been a good thing because I don't feel shaky when I wake up. I don't get typical hangovers, no nausea, no headache, occasionally I would get heartburn but I had been getting this awful shaky feeling the day after a night time binge (and, no lie, it's always a binge on the weekends) and I hated that. I seem to be managing that better. It's not that I don't have the urge to drink during the week, I do, but I don't have any issues resisting it, or not thinking about it. I think I probably could be classified as a Weekend Alcohilic, that's probably true, but I don't have any intention of quitting right now.

Poor us, we are all so sick this week. Haley was out of school sick for two days, I called off tonight, and Tim is seriously ill tonight as well. It sucks. I am ready for winter to be over, there is too much sickness going around.