Today in Book Six: Trying to Hold On 2019

I am feeling… emotionally hollowed out about now. Play Practice last night went poorly. That is actually GOOD. Week of the show, you want a few rehearsals to feel rocky because if you peak early… nobody is going to see it. Got home; Wife had already started to cook food. So that is good. It is a nice change to come home around 8:30 and have food already started instead of reminding my Wife to feed herself and then having to prepare something for the both of us. She even hugged me hello without me asking her to. Kissed me on the forehead at bedtime. But… yeah. That… is our relationship. Dinner being cooked without me needing to do it; being hugged without asking for it; and a kiss on the forehead. Welcome to married life!

Obviously, I am not nor would I actively pursue Emily. She is… beautiful. But a poly-girl with a husband, kids, and a boyfriend… and I’m still married… I mean, aside from the possibilities for an HBO Drama-Comedy series… it really doesn’t sound like a great idea, yeah? Besides, the show comes to an end on Sunday and then… who knows if I’ll ever even see her again, right?

And I may have been wrong about when Couple’s Counseling is. I thought it was this Saturday. It might be next Saturday. Either way… it is coming soon. And I have prepared something regarding it. Mostly questions like “Why are we still at the beginning steps of trying to start to try?” and “After a full year, baby steps towards a marriage should equal at least one full complete step.” and “is it in any way fair or acceptable to tell me to be patient when after everything we’ve been through; we’re still treating ‘saying I love you without being asked’ and ‘making physical contact without being asked’ as high marks of praise?!”

So that is where I am to start this dark and bitterly cold day. How are y’all?