FoodTube in Current Events

My mental health has compromised my appetite in the following ways:
-I’m not eating
-yuh

I have no will to eat. I don’t even notice. Hunger is more comfortable than feeling anxiety. This can be dangerous territory. I only have breakfast items for my meal preps. I collapsed yesterday, I didn’t faint but when I feel that coming I drop straight down just in case. It’s a long way down for me, I’m 6 feet tall. I ain’t had any reason to meal prep so I’ve only been going one meal at a time. I think that might be the problem… or at least the solution? I wish there was takeout options for me. I could just go to a drive-thru. Vegan options are hard to come by but the game has changed at the grocery stores so I dragged my cute butt to one and bought a bunch of ready and made vegan stuff so that I could at least have some easier food to make. I’m too depressed to put on a big production. I was actually going to make lasagna but I forgot that I needed to make a tofu ricotta a day in advance. I use cashews in my recipe for that and I failed to notice that I ran out. Also, cashews are expensive. I only bother because I tell myself that nuts are like my new meat section. I also need fresh basil and my basil froze to death so I need to procure fresh basil which is actually hard to come by. It sells too fast.

My meal plan was to make Carribean jackfruit with rice and fried plantain. I was going to repurpose the leftovers to make nachos the next day. I was going to fry mashed potatoes with cumin seeds, mustard seeds, turmeric and curry leaves to put on toast with cilantro chutney. The lasagna was also going to last a few days. I was aiming to make pumpkin pie breakfast bars too. I wish Hetal was here, she would make food for me. I want dosa so bad. The place that I go to that has Sri Lanka recipes has a vegan dosa but they never have the sonbar ready. It’s like a giant tortilla made with rice and chickpea flour that has a filling which you also dip in a soup dip the way you would with a cheesesteak sandwich and it’s usually served with coconut chutney and mango salsa. The sonbar is like the real star of the show. They tried to offer me chickpea curry instead of the sonbar last time and I was like… bish! I know better! Man, I’m finally getting my appetite back just thinking about it. South Asian food just has it going on for me. I have been trying to procure dried rose petals so that I can also try some Persian, Turkey & Morocco recipes. Oh, I haven’t made Samosas in a while. K! I should do that tomorrow! I would buy them but I always have a reaction unless they’re homemade. Are they sneaking in dairy? Samosas are like Perogies but better lol. I haven’t had Perogies since I went vegan… I can probably make a bomb filling. Oh! I can totes throw together a pizza pop or pocket K! My creative juices are finally flowing. For tonight I caved and decided to make pizza. My sister was like “isn’t that the opposite of easy?” and I’m like… it’s actually one of my easiest recipes and why I make it so much.

On my way back from the store I saw that the Hotel they were building all summer is done. I am thinking about applying there. I want to see if they have any dope amenities that I’m allowed to use first. It’s close to home and why not? They better not try and hide me in the back somewhere as always, I’m too cute for that. Speaking of racism, why do I feel like I am foreign? Like I don’t belong here? I’m First Nations. My experience as a person of colour has not been the worst. My experience as a gay man has not been the worst. I think that I feel guilty about it? That I should be suffering more. My feeds on IG are all racially and homophobia charged, it must be my metadata. My data was sold to companies that use it to determine what content I will see and the end game is to influence me on what to think and do. According to The Hack on Netflix. I might be getting some cross-contamination for the US lol. I make NO sense right now. I’m just trying to kill time while my pizza dough is rising.

Speaking of Jesus, it’s October and that used to be my favourite month. I loved Halloween. My niece and I decided to decorate this year. I also have my movie lineup ready to go. It is not February when I wish that I wasn’t single, it’s October. Interview with a Vampire, then its sequel Queen of the Damned. Repo the Genetic Opera, The Boys in the Trees, The Devils Rejects, Passion of the Christ (jk), High Tension, the Descent, Practical Magic, Hocus Pocus, Shortbus (jk), Bram Stoker’s Dracula, Everything Tim Burton and I’m too scared to watch anything new that is scary that came out so I need a lap that I can cry on and bleep to squeeze (jk) to get through it.

Anyways, I got to put my pizza together. Roll a dough, make a sauce and cut up some toppings. That’s not complicated to me lol. Here is some nice background noise that I found today