Fires in Bittersweet

  • Aug. 20, 2019, 2:27 a.m.
  • |
  • Public

Not that it makes national news or anything but Alaska is on fire again. We do fires big and dangerous. 1 to the south, 2 30 miles to the north of me. The one to the north, my sons teacher from last year lost her house. And several other people i know of have lost their homes too. Its awful. We have a beetle that infects our evergreens. It kills the entire tree making it fire fodder. We get high winds, 50 mph knocking trees down on powerlines, knocking powerlines down and we have fires.
The smoke is terrible here. We arent much risk of being in the fire, 30 miles away. But the smoke is so thick, its hazy in the yard. You smell it, you breathe it. The kids schools canceled after school activities and outdoor activities due to smoke. They even had to shut down the outside air pulling AC and put them on internal air at the high school. Thats awful. Poor kids in the heat and thick air from so many bodies crammed together. My sons jr high was demolished in the earthquake last november so all the high school and jr high kids are now in one school. Its cramped and hard.

In other news, its firmly fall here. The leaves are golden and brown and falling. Half gold half green. The bugs have eaten so many. My sessions are becoming more and more golden and fall colored. Winter is so close.

Our move date is only 7 weeks away… SO close yet so far. Snow will fall before then. Or at least soon after. I expect snow on the drive.

I found a brand new pull behind cargo trailer for 50% off. Kid used it once to move. selling it. So we bought that. ITs not large, small enough for the car to pull. But it means 10 more totes we can fit. Also a bit more stuff like food and whatnot we can pack in there instead of in our cars.

Husband packed his gun related stuff. I packed a good chunk of my fiber and wool. I had 3 good days in between thyroid storms and now im falling back asleep. Im making an iron rich beef roast for dinner. Hopefully i can pull myself up long enough to start packing.

The extra cargo space means i can bring my pots and pans with. Means i dont have to worry about my kitchen aid or instant pot. My favorite accessories. Means i can bring my fabric for sewing :D Means a bit more toys. Although my kids mostly just care about their legos and computers haha.

I booked a birth this week. Shes 39 weeks, so ANY moment. First time mom, i think shes going to go closer to 41 weeks, but we will see. She is VERY low. I went to meet with them, and they said they fell in love with my about me page and that was it. They knew i was the right person. Then when i came for my in person interview. She said she felt more like an old friend came to breakfast, not someone who is pretty much interviewing for a job. Its as much an interview of them of me, as it is me of them too. I walked out feeling confident and excited. They have since friended me on facebook and send me excited texts and updates. :) Its good, i feel good. I do hope that once we get down there, i can book a few more. I love the idea of doing home/birth center birth photography.

Btw my catchy about you? It says i want to meet you. The you that hides in between the cheesy smiles and quick wit. I want to meet the you that is the soft secret person. To Create a photo that says. This is not only me at this time, but this is who I am. My about me, is all about my client in a way. But the cool thing is, they said it taught them all they needed to know about me. Sure they learn im a mom of 5, that i have an autoimmune disorder, that i spin and knit. But they learn about the style of photography that matters most to me and WHY. I explain my why. Usually while crying haha. But thats me too. I felt more myself, more accepted and happier sitting with three strangers ( birth parents and attendent) then i do with so many people.

THAT is my ideal client. THOSE kind of people. The happy in love young couple, who can splurge on something like birth photography. Who not only want someone there, but want someone who wants me to be a part of it with them. People whos photography goal isnt always perfection, but capturing the connections.

Its my reason, my why, and i need it to be theirs too. Ill photograph anyone. Dont get me wrong. But the people that i remember, and feel the most invested in are the ones that feel invested in me too. People who see the fairy tale in the world still. Who see the magic. Who feel. Those are the ideals :D

I can find people like that.

You know what a random person told me today. They will drive the 12 hours from their location to my new place so i can photograph their family. That means that somehow ive touched them more then the thousands of photographers between our locations. That something ive done, means more to them, then local people. That they are willing to pack up their family for a probably 4 day trip! For photos.

THAT is amazing. THAT is validating. THAT makes me FEEL i mean REALLY feel. Of all the friends who say they want to get together before i leave and never said anything else. Strangers make me feel loved and appreciated and wanted.

Im struggling in one spot of moving. What do i do with my containers of oil infusions. I started this prosbook on the goal of writing about my infusions and let it get off topic. Which is fine. I need a place to chat sometimes too. And i do so enjoy interactions with people. I dont think i can pack any of them with me. I may be able to take my plantain and reduce it in some bees wax and coco butter to make a salve. The kids love it. Im afraid of jars breaking or freezing along the way. Probably better to leave them here with my mother in law.

Little girl got her ears pierced. Im not sure if i mentioned that. Now every pair of earring she finds, she wants me to put in my holes to prove i had my ears done as a baby. Today im wearing gemstone swans.... Better then the rainbow poop emogies she wanted me to buy haha.

Ahh im getting really tired and need to work on this photo session. Then I really want to take a nap.
And no more freaking gluten. Im feeling as bad now as i was last week. I ate some breaded stuff and now im feeling worse. So maybe its connected, maybe its iron. I dont know… may as well tick off all the boxes..
Shoot ears starting to hurt, hypoallergenic always hurts. I react to it. Time to pull the earrings out!


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