The letter, what do you think in Torridaussity Two

So I had written a rough draft of the letter I sent to him and I am sharing it here so that I can get your opinions as to why it has caused him to not communicate with me. I am using X as I don't even want to write his name. Dear X,

You may find this letter cheesy, but I needed to write to you. This past month I've been doing a one month to live challenge that is to help you focus your faith in God and to help you focus on what's truly important to you. One challenge is to question relationships and whether you tell the people in your life how important they are to you. I thought about who I wanted to talk to if I only had one month to live and what I needed to tell them and you are one person on the list.

I wanted to tell you that over the 10 years or so that we've known each other I've come to consider you a close friend and that you mean a lot to me. I know we don't talk often and we don't truly know each other's deepest darkest secrets, but I firmly believe if I needed you, you would be here for me. I want you to know that I'll always be here for you. I don't know how close you are to your family and friends, but before you get shipped out again I just felt the need to let you know that you're never alone. Not only will I be there for you, but God will be too. I don't know if you believe in God, but I can't imagine facing what you will face without God in your corner. I'm not writing this to convert you or to make sure you're saved, but rather to make sure no matter what you go through you know you're never alone.

You're gift is a cross of mine that if you want you can take with you. I know it's cheesy, but I just had this feeling that you should have it. The cards (two cards with bible verses on being strong and courageous) well you may or may not appreciate, depending on your faith and if you don't want them perhaps you can pass then on to someone needing some extra strength. The pictures you had asked me for awhile ago I wanted to get them to you before you left. No one knows the future perhaps we both only have a month to live or 10 to 100 years to live, but I knew in my heart I had to write this and send you the package before you left. I hope you don't think it's weird or cheesy. From doing this challenge I'm really seeing what's important in my life and learning not to accept less than what I deserve.

I will miss knowing you are not just a message or text away )ironic since I don't text or FB you much now), but not having that option will be sad. I will be thinking of you and praying for you while you are gone and I am holding you to visiting me when you get back and I am still inviting myself to see your cabin and goats. When we met I thought you were absolutely crazy and that you didn't have much focus in your life, but that you had great potential. You are still completely crazy, but definitely have goals and I'm so very proud of you. I can't imagine choosing to enlist during the time that you did, for that you are a hero. Love, Maria PS (this was a joke from a text) You're a hottie and you should know it. You also have a heart of gold and I'm still swooning, wink, wink.

So that's the letter and before you comment know I am pretty sure he believes in God because he did go to church with me, has always accepted my prayers and never said he wasn't. But if he isn't then I could see maybe the letter putting him off. Secondly maybe it was too morbid since he is being shipped out and I mentioned the challenge and not knowing when we could die.

As you can see though I thought we were close and were good friends and with him not responding at all to even to acknowledge that he got it just makes me wonder how wrong I could be. Did I overwhelm him so much he doesn't know what to say? Should I have never sent the letter? So many questions that it looks like I will never have the answer to. You can tell I have a lot of faith, so I pray that I will let it go. I contrary to what I wrote earlier will never let go of him. It is a flaw of mine or a gift I shouldn't give, but even if I am hurt once you are my friend, you are always my friend and I will always care about him and worry especially while he is deployed. I guess what bothers me now is if I somehow hurt him and didn't mean too. I am hurt yes, but if I accidentally hurt him I would feel horrible. Help, why is life so complicated sometimes.