Fuck it in ❅journal 2019❅

Fuck it.

My ex had me on a schedule to maintain my health. Bedtime is 9:30 pm. Weekends it’s later if good. Three meals a day. No talking bad about myself. No suicidal thoughts. No harming myself. The hallucinations are lying and never listen. Asking what day it is.

Fuck that. Fuck it all. I can take care of myself, both of my exes appear to think otherwise. I’m depressed that’s why I’m such a downer, I’m not incompetent.

Sorry if these journal entries are sporadic, I can’t explain why they are.

Note: im rereading this hours later and im goimg to clarify some things, both i and my girlfriend had set bedtimes for each other, i do not self harm physically but mentally. More to explain later.