Today I turn 39 in Torridaussity Two

This will be short. I turn 39 today. I am not ready to be 39. There is so much I wanted to have in my life by now that I don’t and I question if I ever will. This past year has been a rough one. Time spent working on dealing with these closed doors in my life and trying to accept that they may never open for me and that I am destined to live a very different life than I have dreamed of. Today I am doing my best to celebrate what I do have…took the day off, am getting a massage, and then my best friend and her husband and kids are taking me to dinner. I am going into year 39 still a mess, having physical health issues, emotional issues, work issues, and family issues, but today my actual birthday, I will live just for today and celebrate as if none of that exists. I will do better at updating and reading I hope soon. Love you all, thanks for reading.