No $ for bills, 2nd job= house? in Misadventures of West Virginia Woman

Talan decided to switch banks. When he did his paycheck didnt make it on time for our rent, or bills. I didnt make enough money at my part time job at Ollies to pay the bills. 20 hours at minimum wage doesnt prove much. I feel like a failure and defenseless. I dont like this feeling i have no intentions of feeling this way long!

Yesterday mom and i looked at dishwashers and clothes dryers a part of me died when i realised it would take over 2 months of all my paycheck from Ollies to afford it.

Mom and i had dinner at Sams Club. We had frozen chocolate yogurt and i ate a hotdog. Mom found a really nice couch she wants to purchase there. I caught myself jealous she can afford it. I really liked the couch. Mine is tore to shreds cotton batting sticking out we should have threw it out years ago. Due to financial issues we just cant put the couch out of its misery yet!

I was hoping to have fun this summer but life is agrivating me to the point in order to live comfortably eventually i must work my ass off today. I am putting job applications in for a second job. This 2nd job will hopefully help us get by and with a lot of hard work hopefully enough cash eventually to afford a house! I dont mind the trailer park i am living in but i desire more stability in my life!

I am tired everytime my mom gets angry she threatens to sell the mobile home out from under me because i still owe her payments. I am tired anytime Talan gets mad at mom he threatens to move me to Virginia. I like my hometown! I dont want to move. Visit maybe but dont force me to leave! I need to know something belongs to me and cant be took away.

I found a beautiful 2 bedroom 1 bath bungalow with a nice basement and a beautiful yard for $45,000. I fell in love with the garage. I desired knowing no one could take it away from me. I pouted knowing i cant afford the payment. Instead trapping myself in a house payment i deciding working a 2nd job is my only choice. If i have 2 jobs and Talan works his one with hardwork someday i will own something without debt! I decided i will not stop until i can lay cash down!

Mom and dad paid cash for their house before i was born. Did the repairs and renovations theirselves. Mom bought the extra property next door and even took truckloads of dirt to fill the hollow to create land to build a garage and apartment on. She bought the property across the road rent out that mobile home to our neighbor. After dad passed away mom said all their hard work was worth it.

She is so grateful they never got in heavy debt over property. I want to lead by their example even though i might work myself half to death! Tom and Lesa live on moms property in the apartment. My sister in law Lesa is such a bitch i avoid her. My mom threatens to kick tom and lesa out on the regular.

Mom and Talan often talk shit about each other. Yesterday Talan threatened crash my bravada into the wall because head gasket is blown and i cant afford to fix it. I still owe mom $500 on it. Talan says scrap it mom says fix it but no one give a damn my opinion. I feel defeated.. Why wont anyone listen?

I hate having good morals. Some people prostitute and sell drugs to get by. It is against my morals so here i am pissing another summer away at 2 jobs instead of having fun! Last year i work 12 hour days at Rescare taking care of special need clients who cuss me and beat me up! Only God knows what i will do this summer.. Damn this sucks goodbye fun!

Last updated April 06, 2019