Friday for valentines ......where do I begin? I had been excited all week to see him. We have been dating for about a month now and we were just getting to really know each other. He brought me to his apartment to make me a dinner. The night before he asked me what I wanted to eat and I said homemade tacos and beer(something easy for the guy) heh. We had a wonderful time cooking food and listening to music.....making glances and sharing kisses here and there. After dinner he tried to make desert that failed but we laughed as we got even more drunk. We then went into the bedroom where he had rose petals on the bed and a rose with chocolates for me. I was in awe at so caring and sweet he was. We had GREAT sex and when we were done just laid together. Then he grabbed the rose and traced it all on my body complimenting my legs, saying "I love your legs, I love your arms, and so on. Then he got to my chest say I love your heart......then said I love you" I knew I felt strongly for him.....I knew if I didn't say it back it would not only crush him but damage the relationship. I said I love you back......and I don't know if I do.
The next morning he assured me again he loved me and I again said it back. We then went out for his next plan for the weekend which was zip lining ......so much fun! We then drove home, got pizza, and we both were tired so went to bed. Then I don't know what happened. I felt weird, I felt pressure, he had bought me things for his apartment like a hair brush, toothbrush, body wash, etc. I felt like I was living with him, in a relationship, and it has barely been 3 months since I left my last 3 year relationship. I got up in the middle of the night and made up some stupid story like my stomach hurt and if he can bring me home (the best I could do at the time) and as he drove me home he will make sure he has tums or something at his place. I felt so guilty because there were no stomach cramps.......I was scared. I was panicking. I couldn't tell him......I don't know how. It's gonna break his heart I lied telling him I love him and acting all lovey dovey the whole weekend saying we are boyfriend/girlfriend now. I was happy....I was excited......then I guess overload? It's only been a month.....so fast......my heart and mind are so confused. I don't know if I should end this. I'm going crazy!ugh
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