Unwarranted Anxiety - 15.02.14 in Your Face

  • Feb. 16, 2014, 12:04 a.m.
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  • Public

Feeling a bit anxious today. It's that feeling that my move is on the horizon. In stark contrast to my previous entry, I am once again looking in M's direction. I wish my emotions could be more stable, but until I know something, they just can't be. Now, I just feel overwhelmed at getting the last things done, at making the money work. I feel afraid to spend a cent.

My mind just runs away from me too much. I need to shut it out and just focus on the now.

Been having nightmares lately. One about walking into a public bathroom to take a shower, and there being a dead body submerged in a tub. Deciding to just shower quickly and GET OUT, pulling the shower curtain closed and hearing the water in the tub splash.... Racing out of the bathroom and down the stairs to get out, terrified to turn around.

I'm (finally) being tested for diabetes, and have to collect all my pee in a big bottle for 24 hours. To say I am horrified is an understatement. I have no idea how I'm going to pull this off in a house with zero privacy or consideration. Watch my mother fuck with it or throw out my pee bottle. OMG.


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