"7 PEOPLE I'D RATHER DISMISS AND IGNORE FOR GOOD INSTEAD OF ARGUING WITH IN 2019" in "NOTES ABOUT AND TO ANYONE OR NO ONE IN PARTICULAR"

I have to admit; I’m not too crazy about debates. I used to and I’d do a whole lot more to fight for what I believe in. It wouldn’t matter if people hated my guts for it.

Well, I still don’t care if they still do. I just choose my battles wisely. Instead of wasting my precious time and energy arguing with people who are not even worth it, I prefer dismissing and ignoring them completely. I know that sounds cold, though.

However, for the sake of my own mental health, I know that sometimes I have to be “cruel to be kind”. I’ll just go along with the “agree to disagree” principle, although some people with bloated ego tend to push me beyond my limits. Here they are:

1. People whose only true aim is to win the argument – at all costs.
   Forget trying to talk some sense into their heads. Their bloated ego is way too delicate. It doesn’t matter if you know you’re right and you have valid proofs for that.

To them, losing an argument (especially to the types of people they don’t really respect) is as embarrassing as looking stupid in public. They do feel stupid, because they bet on their dignity and pride – just to win an argument. They can also be some other type of people (or all) below on this nasty list of mine.

1. People who love attacking you personally (especially when they know exactly how flawed their arguments are!)
   When they lose an argument, they make sure that your victory tastes like dirt. They can wail and lament with something like: “But you don’t have to be so mean to me!” (even when it’s obvious that you point out the flaws on their arguments – not who they are.)

Another childish way they do is name-calling. If you happen to have others who support your opinion, they usually snicker with plain bitterness: “Nice, you’ve got plenty on your side”. This is obviously just their cheapest move to make themselves feel better. One word for that: pathetic.

1. People who refuse to move on from the argument.
   Why is it so bloody hard for these people to just “agree to disagree”? The reason is simple: it’s just their insecurity.

Stating their opinion (especially on something they have zero clue about) as loudly and rudely as possible is not good enough. They have to gain your acknowledgment, one way or another. They demand that you agree with them.

Forget giving them the silent treatment. In some cases, they even become dangerous stalkers – insisting that you come face-to-face to “talk things over” (when all they ever really want to do is pose a threat on you.)

If they fail to do so, they can start exploiting others to hate you too. For people who can’t stand losing, it turns out that they also need others to support them. Meanwhile, you have a life, with better and more important things to deal with than putting up with such childish tantrums.

1. Arrogant, dismissive people (alias ‘the know-it-alls’.)
   They act this way just because they believe they’ve read enough already. They don’t even bother listen to you or let you have your turn to speak. (In fact, they tend to make fun of you while you are in the middle of what you are saying.)

They always think they’re smarter than everybody else around them. Once again, it doesn’t matter if you know what you know and have valid proofs to counter their flawed arguments.

In reality, there are always much smarter but wiser enough people to remain quiet and only speak when most necessary. They have read more books than those who claim they’ve read them all, but they never brag to the world.

Their favourite line to deny your argument is: “Show me the statistics to prove you’re right about this.” Before they start doing so, why don’t they do the same first? This what always happens when you only rely on your loud voice and attitude. Just plain annoying and rude.

1. People who act like sulking little kids with tantrums.
   What really turns me off and leaves the argument altogether is when the other person starts acting this way. The most common example I often hear is: “Okay, fine. You’re always right and I’m always wrong. Whatever.”

After that, I’d rather be deaf and pretend they no longer exist. Why? I prefer having a healthy, sensible conversation with a real adult than an overgrown grumpy child. If next time I hear another one give me such immature responses, I suggest they do something critically important first:

Grow up.

1. People who argue with something completely irrelevant or OOT (out-of-topic) just to dodge you or throw you off the track.
   “Are you always this nasty to people?”

“You really hate me this much, don’t you?”

“If you keep acting like this, then nobody wants to be with you.”

This attempt has a more popular term nowadays: ‘gaslighting’. Instead of discussing the same topic with at least almost the same level of maturity (if not intelligence or knowledge), they try to focus on ‘what is seriously wrong with you’ instead of simply admitting their faults – or staying in the topic. Doesn’t that drive you crazy?

My advice? Let them have the last word and walk away. They are simply not ready to be argued against; they just want to be heard, understood, and agreed on. How selfish is that? Wait, that’s none of your business. It’s their problem.

1. People who realise they’re losing an argument and you’re right (or both), but then quickly act as if you’ve been agreeing on the same thing. (When in fact no.)
   When the heated argument is suddenly met with a pretty lengthy, deadly pause before they suddenly say: “That’s my point” after they’ve defensively countered your arguments all along, just silently laugh it off. Like the previous one, they need to have the last word to make them feel like they’ve earned or won something.

When it comes to discussions and arguments, real mature adults focus on finding a solution to a problem. Others simply want to sound smart and win the argument. Take your pick.
R.