Intuitive Eating in Musings

After initially letting myself eat all the foods at the holidays I got back with it started calorie counting and exercising a lot. I was miserable to be honest. And always am any time I restrict my diet. Then I ran across a post on Facebook that possibly changed my life.

It was about diet culture and opting out of it. I went down the rabbit hole and was introduced to the idea of intuitive eating. It’s the way of eating that says listen to your body, eat when you’re hungry, stop when your full, and enjoy your food.

It was a light bulb moment for me. It just makes so much sense. Since I have been doing it the past week I feel amazing. I have not gone off the rails and in fact and eating much more nutritiously than I was before.

And it comes with a much bigger challenge: accepting my body for what it is. I’m a petite person so any amount of fat is noticeable. I have grown two children inside of me and the muscles of the abdomen are not what they used to be. I have stretch marks that line my lower belly and upper thighs.

And I’m beautiful.

It feels so vulnerable to say that or even think it. I’ve been insecure since I was little and was taught that saying things like “I am pretty” makes you arrogant. But it doesn’t. It makes you honest because all bodies are beautiful.

I know that sounds hippie dippy and maybe it is. But I really do see so much beauty in the diverse bodies the world has to offer. And I’m finally finding that beauty in myself.

I’ll probably never be a size 2 again. I’ll never have a flat stomach. I’ll always have chubby cheeks and pale skin. But I have big blue eyes. Manageable hair. I’ve always liked my thick thighs and butt. And all together it comes to make up me.

And I’m no longer going to starve myself to change who I am.