Additional Rambling in Book Five: Working Through the Maze 2018

  • Dec. 26, 2018, 1:29 p.m.
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So… all Private firms have this week off, it seems. My “friends on Facebook Messenger” list is now pretty much everyone from Law School being bored. And why not? Courts aren’t doing shit today. I’m not doing shit today. Which is a bad place for me to be.

Didn’t sleep last night.
Lunch Counter closed for the week so no lunch.
Therefore, I am super tired. I am hungry. And I want to get laid.
Strange how 6 months can feel like an eternity. I honestly don’t even remember much about it, to be honest.

Moving on… I’m here. Hungry. Sleepy. Horny. Bored. Updating the front page repeatedly to see if I have any new notes. Also, cruising through facebook isn’t helping. It doesn’t solve the boredom. It makes me more depressed. And after scrolling past smiling families, birth announcements, advertisements, occasionally I’ll get a CosPlay photo
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which doesn’t help my mood or disposition. Which is the danger of being left alone with my thoughts like this at a time like this. Because… tired… hungry… I am much quicker to go to negative thoughts.

I mean… the counseling has helped. My Dad specifically mentioned it to me. He noticed that Wife was interacting with the family more, was helping, was talking, was engaging. So we are seeing her deal with some of her mental blocks and self-imposed bullshit. And good for her. She’s needed to get over that shit for YEARS so I’m glad she’s doing it.

And last night, she specifically said that she enjoys spending time together and enjoys doing stuff with me; whether it is working out together, taking a walk, or just discussing the house… she said she enjoys the time she spends with me.

So there is good there. There is good going on.

But I’m tired. And I’m hungry. And I want to get laid. And I’m bored. So that puts my mind and emotions to the negative. So, yeah. Just… trying to deal with my negative thoughts.

In order to combat those thoughts, I turn to the Gutenberg Project and read some Charles Dickens.

My parents are stopping by the house on Sunday. It will be my mom’s first ever time seeing the house, so that’ll be great. I hope to get my father’s assistance on determining if and how we can best get furniture into our basement. Because after that conversation comes to a specific answer… then we can (1) sofa/sectional downstairs; (2) dinner table downstairs and chairs; (3) wood cabinet; (4) Home Theater set up; (5) guest bed; (6) guest room furniture.
And getting all of that finished would be good.
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Of course, getting all of that set up doesn’t mean we’re DONE. We still have all sorts of repairs and fixes and stuff like that to do around the house. But if we could JUST finish moving in and setting up furniture that would be good.

I suppose I can attempt to rile up enough energy to write the following…
this weekend I was looking at various on-line areas and I find a PhD in Women’s Studies write
All. Men. Are. Trash. Not a single one is better than absolute garbage. However, in that garbage, some trash is better than others. But never forget. They are all trash.

It was her comment that all men are awful but they are not all equally awful.

Now, someone quickly retorted, “My husband is not trash. He is a stay at home dad, cares for our kids, cooks, cleans, and takes care of me all the time. He is NOT Trash.” And the original poster started arguing with the woman, in some misguided or vainglorious attempt to try to convince this woman that her husband was garbage.

THIS, friends, is the kind of overbroad generalized gendered statement that creates waves where none need exist. ESPECIALLY as we see how this kind of thing (1) First, divides people; (2) Then isolates the different groups from one another; (3) in order to sell an extreme message.

ALL MEN ARE TRASH, no arguing
Is a rallying point for Mens Right’s Red Pill, Incel, fuckbois looking for proof that feminism is about ragging on men and tearing down the male gender.

ALL MEN ARE TRASH, no arguing
Is a rallying point for the worst kind of Feminism where the entire point shifts from empowering women and representing women to becoming male focused and tearing down the male gender.

And that’s a shame. Because we should be joining together as allies. Supporting one another to create a more just and equal world. If the rallying cry is “Everything human with a penis is a bad person” not only is that short sighted (trans) but it seems divisive for no other reason than simply TO BE divisive.
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My pain is really starting to aggravate me. Which threatens to create additional sleep problems tonight! Therein lies the joy of a chronic pain condition. “Work out.” Okay, but if I work out even a little bit too hard the pain will make it hard to sleep. “Sleep better.” Uhm, if I don’t sleep well and my pain increases, then it is even harder to sleep the next night. And the night after that.

So ultimately… if I make it through the work day and I make it through another drive and Christmas Obligation… then I can go home and soak. Which I will very much need to do.
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