Randomness....and eggs. in Other shit.

So, I'm not really sure what to write anymore.

I have been writing solely about Lion it seems for so long.

And now I've made that book private. Because one, he doesn't deserve to read my pain as STMLu said.

And two, well....the first one.

There is so much I could write about. But just because I'm not wanting to write about Lion doesn't mean my mind is clear of it all. It's not. And I'm STILL hurting three months later.

And here I am about to write more about it.

I'm not. I'm not going to.

With the shutting down of OD, old friends have shown up......some nice to see...some not.

I dunno.

It's supposed to snow in the next few days. The last time it snowed I hurt myself really badly and ended up in bed/couch for a week.

I won't say how or why because someone who might read this doesn't deserve to know.

But anyway, I'm not exactly excited about it. But it is pretty and Froggy will have fun playing in it if it actually sticks and accumulates.

My arms hurt so bad right now. I made lasagna all day yesterday. The noodles just about killed my arms. My pasta rolling cranking thing has no "vice" so I had to hold it down with one hand and crank with the other and it was just an utter pain in the ass.

I MUST see if Kitchenaid sells a pasta attachment.......

My life is out of whack right now. And I just can't set it right.

I feel like it's never going to be right again. Ever.

It's cold. I'm going to put something warmer on and curl up under my blankets.

I plan to make November cakes tomorrow. Which means the oven will be on a lot which means the house will be warm...

I got birdies for myself for my birthday. I can't remember if I mentioned this or not.

But they have eggs and the eggs are not going to hatch, I'm afraid. They are supposed to hatch by day 14. But can still hatch by day 20. I'm pretty sure....it's been....a full month now they've been sitting on the eggs.

ALL THREE of them.

The two females AND the male. They are not active during the day. Or ever now. All they do is sit on those eggs that are NOT going to hatch.

I'd like to yell at Jasmine. (The MALE) Wouldn't he KNOW if he fertilized the damn eggs?

I'm looking at him in the nest thinking.....why don't you know that you didn't poke either one of those girls and that those eggs are not going to make anything!?

Men.

Lion says men are stupid.

He says it a lot.

I think it's just an excuse for them TO BE stupid. To say that.

"let's just say we're stupid so women won't expect anything out of us."

Anyway. It's been a month. 30 days.

The first eggs showed up I think on the 8th of January and we are on the 10th of February now.

So I don't think there's any chance left that they'll hatch. I did the whole candle test and they looked like they were in there.

OMG. IT's gonna make me so sad to throw them out. But it can't be healthy for them to be sitting on those eggs all the time if they're not going to hatch.

They come out of the nest to eat, drink, and bathe. A couple times a day. Each one taking turns.

They won't stop sitting on the eggs till they're gone.

It's just going to kill me to. And I'm not sure WHY. I mean it's obvious they are not babies in them.

Just the thought I suppose.

I was dreading having more birds when I first saw the eggs. Because I have three and it's my first time owning them.

So as they kept laying to 5 eggs. I was like. OMG. But then I got really really excited to see it all happen.

And now there won't be babies....sigh.

I guess they will do it again till eventually it will be spring and hopefully Jasmine will like Earl. Cause I don't think Grey is feeling Jasmine.

He really tries to impress her. But to no avail. But he's a little bully-ish about it.

I've seen him puff his chest out and fluff his feathers and sing and nearly knock Grey over pushing her.

Arrogance. Another not so nice trait men have.....

At least Lion taught me that. Stupid and arrogant. Men.

Sorry, guys.

I'm not feeling so good about Lion right now. So I have nothing nice to say. I feel so empty of any kind of anything anymore.

My happy bucket is totally empty. I don't think anyone is going to fill it any time soon.

Boop.