"THE ART OF NOT GIVING A DAMN" in "THE WORDPLAY WARRIOR: The Plot Pieces Called 'Life' "

I don’t want to boast, but plenty of people have told me that I look quite young for my real age. How old am I? Some have known, some will still have to guess. It’s been fun so far, at least most of the time. Their reactions have been quite varied.

“No way. Show me your ID.”

“You’re kidding, right?”

“How can you look this young?”

For the last one, I sometimes half-smugly answer:

“It’s the art of not giving a damn.”

Some of them usually laugh. Others agree. Some are rather spiteful that they say this:
“No, that’s because you’re childish. You never take life seriously.”

Oh, thank you very much. Whoever has said that to me, no worries. I’ll make sure you won’t hear much from me next time.

Anyway, when I say ‘the art of not giving a damn’, that doesn’t mean I’ve stopped caring completely. There’s a difference there.

I’ve learned to pick my battles wisely. Instead of fighting against the whole world who may disagree with me once in a while, I (choose to) focus on what I find really matter.

It’s true that I don’t always put makeup on my face. There are certain occasions I do, like weddings for example. Sadly, about this, I’ve received quite a criticism from other females instead:

“You’re over 30 and you’re neglecting your appearance.”

“How can you get any guy like this?”

“Being a tomboy is no excuse. You’re a woman, for God’s sake!”

Yawn.

I suppose many people – sadly, including women themselves – forget the real purpose of ‘dressing up’ and ‘wearing makeup’.

First of all, it’s not always about impressing other people, specifically men. (If some women choose to do so, then go ahead. I’m not going to judge. It’s a personal choice.) It’s also about having fun, entertaining yourself.

Anyway, the art of not giving a damn also means letting go of things you can’t control. The more obsessed you are about them, the more stressed out you become. So what? You can’t tell the whole world what to do. You don’t want them to do the same to you.

Ideally, you may wish for the whole world to work according to your standard and values. Well, other people have their own ideas too. The constant challenge has always been the same:

How to co-exist without trying to destroy each other.

In short, stop trying to please everyone so bloody much. You’ll never get that far.

You can only do your best. That’s it.

R.