2/6/14 in The Door

Today was a little better, sorted things out. My chest still hurts and it's to the point where I cannot go out dancing with a friend. I'm losing friends--I know it--and a part of me is horrified while another is accepting it. I keep hurting people and this only convinces me more than I need to go away until I change. It is very hard right now not to cut myself. There is so much piling up in my head that is scaring me. I feel like the little eleven year-old that hid in her room alone because that is what I do now. If only I could hide from myself.