"THE STORIES BEHIND SCARS" in "WRITER@WORK: Stories From A Lone, Urban Girl"

“You can only be your 100% self when you’re all alone. Still, who are you when you look in the mirror?”

About a decade ago or so, I wrote something like that on my social media timeline. Perhaps it had been more out of bitterness instead of stating the fact.

Obviously, it rings true. It always does.

We all have stories behind our scars. What’ yours? What’s mine? Does it matter? Will discussing each help to heal faster? Will that make us feel any better?

I’m not saying that you have to lie to people all the time, in order to impress them. There’s no point, because lies never really last. You shouldn’t if you really care about them.

However, sometimes caring about them is not good enough. Even when they claim to care about you too, how much will they accept your scars – mental or else? How willing are they to listen without prejudice, more with empathy, to know and understand the stories behind your scars?

Will the scars and the stories behind them change how they feel about you? What if it’s the other way around? How would you feel?

“I love you just the way you are…”

“You look how you’re supposed to. I have no complaints…”

“The scars remind us where we’ve been. They don’t have to dictate us where we’re going.”

Do you really mean what you say? Do you always say what you mean?

Sharing stories about scars is tricky. You may keep quiet about them, probably for the rest of your lives, and then silently wonder whether they’d still love you and forgive you if they knew. You can also challenge them with stories about your scars. After that, wait until they react.

If they still stay, you’re lucky. If not, you’ve got your answer anyway. Your curiousity will have officially been confirmed.

Be ready first before the possibility of receiving questions like this:

So, what’s the story behind those scars?

R.