Different in Inside My Head

Different 4/21/2005

Have you ever felt like you simply don't recognize your life anymore?

Mike came over last night. I made him dinner and then we went over to my friend Meri's house for a little bit because it was her 21st birthday. Mike and I weren't going dt since we both had a lot of work to do. I ended up not doing mine because Mike was on my computer doing his and I simply passed out. But anyway...

Bridgette and Jennie were in my room last night, cuddling with me in bed (before I had gone to sleep) and we were all just goofing off and joking around. They're so extremely nice to me...it's too bad that we didn't get to live with each other all year because this semester living at their house with them has just been a blast.

I woke up at 4am with all of my clothes still on...I took them off and went back to sleep, snuggled into Mike's body. I woke up in that same position...it's the most comforting feeling in the world, waking up next to him. Awhile later I woke up with my back to him and his arms wrapped around me...we had sex three times before he left (late) for work. It's not even the sex that I love so much, but just the feeling of being close to and being wanted by him. It's so odd to think of my life now compared to how it was years ago, when I started this diary. It wasn't even that long ago, but my personality and my life is basically a 180 of what is was.

It's so odd to think that I'm someone's girlfriend...not like how I was Chris's girlfriend, but to be a serious girlfriend with a man that I've come to adore (even if he drives me crazy sometimes). I have a close group of friends who love me, and who I love back. I'm always getting invitations to go out or to go to dinner....In high school and even part of college I felt like a nobody. I felt unloved and unwanted most of the time and I love it that I rarely have that feeling now.

Artist