It's been a night. in My Fucking Feelings

I felt horrible so I went to have a beer and hear you sing. I feel better now. I was glad you were nice to me even though I’m sure you didn’t really want me there.
Impressions: You want me to keep my distance from you and not try to initiate anything. You are happy with your girlfriend. Things are going as planned. You seem to like it when I bring friends. I do too.
I wish I could have bought merch from that one band with the girl who could scream but I was in a hurry. Hopefully I will see them again. I was impressed.
Apparently they are watching me at work. That’s unsettling. I guess I’ll have to turn up my effort even if I’m feeling awful. I wish I had attended the prayer meeting. Also lost my new ring in the car… -.- I really like that one.
Please Lord, let me find my path and my connection again soon. I really hope I make Stanford this next year but what to do until then? My heart is barely hanging on and I’m not even sure what is wrong. I guess I just feel like I have no one to lean on. Yes I have friends, but there’s a special connection of sorts that I’m simply missing. I can feel it. I see other people have it. I just simply seem to not be able to make connections like everyone else. Really starting to wonder what’s wrong with me.

I bet there were some awesome pictures from tonight.