My word, 2 hours of ctrl+c, ctrl+v.
Copying and pasting old entries onto this site, in a private book..i'll make it public once they're all there.
Two hours of this, and I'm perhaps 1/20th of the way through.
All those old entries are bringing back seriously heavy waves of emotions. I was such a touchy negative dramatic spoiled teenager. And I wonder if any thing has changed.
I was rude, inconsiderate, selfish, rash, blunt, and I swung from iloveyouiloveyouiloveyou in one entry after some girl at church said something nice, to fuckfuckfuckfuck when someone left a note or said something that rubbed me the wrong way. There was one entry that I actually counted out everyone that hugged me that day at church, and complained/cussed about everyone that didn't.
We always look back on our flaws and mistakes, I wonder how many of them I have actually fixed, and how many are still here that I'm oblivious of, until I re-read these entries in a year or two.
I need to take the time to seriously sit down and read over every old entry, and let those emotions hit me head on.
I just skimmed tonight, and it shook me. But I feel like I need to face them to be able to leave them in the past for good, tonight it was hard to ignore them, but that's what I did..push them aside, out of your mind.
They're still there tho. I need to get a fire place for all those old files tucked away in my brain.
I am sorry for my flaws. I'm not claiming responsibility for all of them, but I am responsible for fixing them.
Loading comments...