Proof Positive in Book Five: Working Through the Maze 2018

This morning, I had a hearing at 8 a.m. That hearing went until 10:04. This morning I had a meeting at 10:00 a.m. That went until 11:30 a.m. So… first one in the office by a solid hour. When I got back from my meeting? My bosses still weren’t in the office. But they arrived about 10 minutes later. Immediately asking if I had done a laundry list of things for their cases. So, after a second of breath, I jump into their list of stuff. Until, at 1:30, I decide… nope. Fuck you. I’m grabbing lunch. I may eat it at my fucking desk but I’m not skipping a meal just to do your bidding.

And I realized it. Yeaaaaaah. They are going to be shocked and pissed off on Monday morning. Because I can’t keep up this level of activity. This will be my best billing week ever (likely) because I have tried to conform to their standards and expectations. And honestly? What they consider to be their “minimum standard” is bullshit. Between my neck, my back, and my legs? If it were up to me I’d sleep for 3 days straight just to feel “right” again. So… no matter what “bad feelings” or “suspicions” or “concerns” I have about leaving this place? This is the right way to get into “Resignation” mode. I bust my ass harder than ever. You “reward me” by telling me that you’re going to make me cover more of your hearings and do more of your work? As opposed to… y’know… my work and maybe training me on some of these issues? No? Just… sit here and do the work that you don’t want to do while I have my own work to do as well. Got it. Sounds perfect, boss. Oh… and you want me to know that I am still not meeting expectations?

Yeah. That is more than enough for me to proudly say, “I’m out!”

But… and this feels truer and truer with each passing moment… they are going to be surprised and angry when I hand in my resignation on Monday. White Boss has been trying to figure out why the State isn’t giving me more cases and he’s all “You need to handle this. You need to make money.” And Chinese Boss keeps accepting any random ass case from any Chinese Kid before thinking, “Is this a case we can take? Is this something we have time for?” So… just in two days, I got 4 new Chinese Kids to look after. Though… that’s my point right there. If they keep saying “go go go go go” on my cases… but keep asking me to work their cases… then it seems like they are literally saying “Work your own cases on your own time” which… uhm. No. No. That isn’t how this works. I’m not your assistant. I’m not your Second Chair living to do your work. I’ll help if/when I can because I’m that kind of guy but… I have shit to do too, thanks.

So yeah. They’ll be surprised and upset. But… we’ll see how it goes, I guess!?