February Sweeps: GH Edition in Thoughts On...

It is that time of the year when Soap Opera Sweeps happen. The preview for General Hospital was focused on a “death” of a beloved character. Or something like that. Well, as usual, it didn’t take Holmes & Watson to figure out that Nathan was going to “die” after being shot, in what looked like a direct heart shot, by his newly found out about father Faison. I loved that they mentioned “all the blood lost” when talking about Nate’s condition. There was not that much blood. I get it, it is daytime drama, but a little more than an inch diameter stain is not too much to ask is it? And then yesterday, right at the very end of the episode, he flatlined and Maxie took a beat and looked at the monitor and said “Nathan?”. He is in the freaking ICU hooked up to monitors and not one nurse or doctor came rushing in. The GH ICU is interesting because they have a “regular” hospital room with a window, blinds and a door and a HUGE waiting area outside. Not a nurse’s station in site. Thankfully I have not been to other hospital ICU units, but our local hospital has a central nurse’s station with the patient rooms in a U shape around and glass walls, sliding doors (that are only closed when working on a specific patient and the only “blind” is a curtain that is pulled. Only two people are allowed back at a time and you have to be buzzed in after identifying yourself. However at GH, no nurses/doctors. Not even a crash cart outside the room for ready access for a person shot in the freaking chest and barely out of surgery. Surprisingly he did have a nasal oxygen cannula. Fat lot of good it did him. But don’t worry, he got to feel his baby kick and tell his wife he loved her before he “died”. A fetus, mind you that is not even at 20 weeks gestation so would be hard to feel any movement externally. But by the miracle of soap time, I guess finding out you are pregnant right before Thanksgiving and “bumping” right after Christmas could put you at feeling fetal movement by the beginning of sweeps, especially if you are dying.

Also, Bobbie was with Maxie presumably because she works at the hospital but didn’t think to call Maxie’s parents until AFTER someone talked with her about the possibility of donating Nathan’s organs? I thought Bobbie & Felicia were like besties. And her parents are still NOT at the hospital, although her best friend and sister/brother-in-law and muter -in-law are there. Well, her bestie is now at the local diner writing a story because she became a journalist two minutes ago and is already an ace reporter for Aurora or whatever the hell it is called.

I was betting on Nathan’s heart going to Faison (because the transplant list gives zero fucks if you are a wacked out international serial killer and because it is GH and that would only make sense). Since Faison’s other son Heinrick aka Peter shot him. Funny how when Faison shot Heinrick/Peter he WAS wearing a vest, bullet proof that is, but Nathan, the cop, who had been on special duty for a riot, was NOT wearing a vest. That is something Commissioner Jordan may want to address when she hires Curtis as the newest PCPD detective, you know before she fields all the grievances for not going through the proper posting and hiring policies and procedures.

In other news nobody cares about happening in February, the sexual tension between OFJ (Old Face Jason) and Sam is sure to reach critical levels and that will strain her marriage to NFJD (New Face Jason/Drew). And the race for Port Charles Mayor between Ned/Ted and Alexis/Not Laura is bound to be yawn worthy. And the race to the altar for Franco (not James) and Elizabeth (whose golden child Jake will be the only of her three children in attendance) is sure to be even more nauseating than OFJ’s, permanent constipation resting face, brooding.

It’s probably no coincidence that February is the month of red and pink and that Pepto is pink.