I made you Battle Symphony for a reason in In My World

I don’t know if you check these or if you only read them when I send you a link but either way, stop reading. You know who you are and I’m not ready for you to read this yet. Seriously, I’m asking you not to read this.

You scared me so fucking badly last night. I knew you weren’t going to die or anything but you had me so fucking worried. You have to understand that if there wasn’t a fucking ocean between us I would have been there last night. I would have held you close and helped you through it. I can’t do that from here. No matter what you’re going through I can only do so much. I feel stuck and worried and scared and about 8 other emotions. It kills me to see you hurting so much. I know this isn’t about me and it’s unfair of me to make it about me but I need you to know how I feel. I need you to know how this shit affects me because I need you to know just how much I care about you and how scared I am for you. I can’t do anything from here. All I can do is make you talk to me and that only works about 20% of the time anyway.

I started writing this earlier because I was mad at you and because I needed to vent. I’m sorry. I love you so fucking much and you’ve become such a huge part of my life that I just can’t stand the thought of losing you in any capacity. I stopped writing around the same time you decided you needed to be alone.

If you’re reading this right now, I love you so fucking much. Please be safe, it’s all I ask. The voice messages I sent you last night will explain more than this paragraph ever could. I know you were drunk and I know you didn’t mean it but I’m still so scared for you. Please, just be safe until I can bring you home.

Last updated January 24, 2018