talk about it. depression and well. NIs. SU. in 2017. got it.

So. oh wow.
I went downstairs earlier and made pasta. [and by ‘made’ i mean microwaved it.]. and that was. ok i didn’t have too many physical problems w/ doing things.
it was after. Now like a lot of people one of my.........um...........house...............[grab............take.........hold] household. responsibilities is to clean up after myself when i’m done in the kitchen. And usually. I’m pretty good about doing that. but tonight i just. i didn’t. [ok so i cleaned out the container i’d been........um. using and put the pasta sauce back in the.............um..........white thing.]. and this time. it’s not cause i’m annoyed w/ the lady. it’s 1 my brain is so.tired right now i can’t take on much more. and 2. i’m not being apathetic for emotional reasons. no it’s a result of what happened. like sorry. yeah my head changed. things in my head changed.
at least. back when i had my apt. i could be lazy about things like that. and not do them right away.
it’s not cause i’m irresponsible. most of the time. it’s cause something happened.
it’s not fair. for other s to pick up after others. but. that’s not my main priority right now.

so. the second part. of this entry is SU. and depression. and NIs. I’ve read. online something about how. people w/ um/ NIs [and eventually when i’m ready i’ll post exactly what this is] are at an increased risk for SU. now obviously i’m still here. yes. which is why i’m writing about this. If there’s one thing i’ve learned it’s. talk about it. tell someone even if it’s just.i don’t know a plant.
yes.
I literally don’t know how to explain. my feelings on my NI and the er.the link between that and depression, right now. maybe later. and usually i’m so good w/. words.
but apparently. from what i’ve read online about this. msktc.org. The causes are: physical changes in the brain.
ok so...........i know part of it is/are. an emotional response[s]. right ok. but verbalising that.either through um talking or like.on here. is not working right now.
so. sorry for the vagueness.

Last updated January 22, 2018