Oft Magpie in Chapter 2 : The Elle Era

Ok so long time no entry … I know, I know, I’m grounded. Lol. I’m sorry guys but I’ve been a busy busy bee…so since I last wrote an entry what’s happened?? Hmmm…..

Me and Elle went to visit Ma all the way in Scotland, it was almost as cold as my mother’s dead, black heart. We wound up staying at my Nan’s (mmhmmm….excuses excuses…saying no more!) where she proceeded to talk Elle’s head off. Now she knows where I get it from. So yeah, my Nan talked for the WHOLE weekend, Ma whinged ALL weekend, Elle played the dutiful girlfriend ALL weekend and I came very close to killing them all on more than one occasion, but hey that’s what my family is all about. All that said it was a good weekend and we went out for a Birthday/Christmas meal for my 21st (I’m a big girl now…) and Elle’s 27th…and for Xmas as we’ll all be apart as usual (me in England, Nan in France, Mum in Scotland). Anyways on the Saturday, when we got back from the meal I got my birthday cake (bless) we ate cake, we felt sick and generally had a good time and this time when I left on THAT fucking bus with Elle, I realised that finally I’m not alone in this world, that there is someone who really truly loves me and is willing to make my life her life and vice versa, someone that wants to be with even after she’s met my [stark raving mad] family. This time, because she was by my side, my heart didn’t break, it’s no longer my life, and it’s now our life.

So when my 21st birthday, we were in Fuerteventura which was different, to say the least. We got there 3 days before my birthday. Within 4 hours of my arrival at the hotel I was arse-holed, I’d stupidly been drinking Vodka & Red Bull since 8:30 that morning, so I was a little fraught, anyway I digress. We land in Fuerteventura Airport and it’s roasting,, which was GREAT, I haven’t felt heat like that in years, we get on the transfer bus to go to the hotel and all you can see is barren land, not so great. So I’m secretly worrying, all the while Elle’s enjoying the whole fucking adventure, all I could think was well how can I take pictures of this fucking view when all I can see are warehouses and goats?! I could get that shit in Wales!!
An hour and half later and we’re still on the fucking bus, the heat’s no longer so great, the novelty has more than worn off and all I can see, still, is barren bloody land. After 15 minutes and 3 towns we come into another town and head up this hill, half way up the bus stops, no we hadn’t broken down, we’d ARRIVED!!! So after all the travelling and the vodka and the heat and the trek up a mountain (or so it seemed) none of it mattered because we were finally there, and it was beautiful. It was wonderful, to be greeted by not a rep but a waterfall. The food was beautiful and Elle was eating 6 meals a day, 3 freezing pools but spa facilities though!!! SAUNA TIME!!! Arrived on the Wednesday, got pissed on the Thursday, with full hangovers we went poolside and started the tanning process
(book/carrot oil) + music x time = tan.
At about half 3 it got a little cooler and a little darker so we went back to the room and got ourselves ready for a night out in, found a nice little British bar which was the only place (other than Eurospar) to sell Vodka & Red Bull together! Some fella thought he was going to get lucky, there’s always fucking one; Lesbian Dating Bingo anyone? He was buying the drinks, can’t complain, by the time I got Elle back to the hotel she was wasted and her heart rate was through roof….so not much of anything that night for me…not so good. Friday came and went in a blur of heatstroke for me…NOT COOL! But Elle put me to bed that night and then woke me up at 12:01 to welcome in my birthday, she’d arranged flowers and decorated the WHOLE ROOM with banners and balloon, it was so sweet!! She’d even done a little buffet of crisps & pop, stuck a candle in a banana because we couldn’t get a cake. Then my heatstroke went up a notch and I was sick everywhere, it got quite messy and I got VERY emotional, so we stayed in. Elle was poorly the Sunday/Monday nights so we stayed in again but Monday day though we went on a little shopping trip. We had a great holiday, I know it might not sound like it but it was everything I could’ve wanted, food , drink & a tan and the love of my life. Nothing better in my eyes.

So now we’re back home and the weather sucks, the washing up’s waiting , remind us why we came back?

Last updated January 11, 2018