Goodbye, 2017. in Ramblings of a stranger..

I’ll spare myself and everyone else the “new year, new me” shit lol. Day by day for me. I just wanna be less of an asshole than I was yesterday.

Crazy this year is over already.. It went by quickly. Sadly, there isn’t very many changes to my life from this day last year.. I don’t know.. I’m going into the new year with hope. So we will see.

I’m staying in tonight. I’ve told everyone who asked it is because I work tomorrow. I mean I do have work tomorrow, but I also have no desire to be out. I’ll probably be fast asleep under my covers in 2 hours. Pfft lemme quit playing.. Gimmie an hour.

Drill Sargent comes home tomorrow. I’m pretty excited. I’m gonna stay the night with him tomorrow, and he is just gonna take me to work the next day.. This not having a car again thing is getting old, quick.

We’ve been talking almost a year and a half.. And only since we’ve started becoming more serious, I’ve been plagued with doubts. I do this every time. I’m really trying to push out all my nit picking and insecurities and just see where things go… But it is a lot harder than it sounds.

He has done a good job of dealing with me so far I suppose. I go neurotic on him from time to time. I really just can’t wait to be around him. I like being in his presence. He makes me feel safe.. And I like it. Of course your girl is also looking to get laid… I’ve been promised things. However after I collect on those, I’m looking forward to (more than sex) just being able to cuddle with him.. My booty pushed up against him.. His arms wrapped tight around me.. Our legs and feet tangled up.. Ahh I just miss him.

I don’t like that I’m to insecure with where we are to cut off all my back burners.. I’ve been single for so long, I’ve collected quite a few admirers.. And I don’t really want to tell all of them.. “Hey, gotta let you go.. I’m in a relationship… Sorta.. And I can’t do that with you lingering around.. ” just for us not to work out, or him to leave me in this state alone… Ugh

We’ve been getting a lot closer and talking more and more since he’s been outta town.. Maybe things will just be better and different, when he comes home. I know all the shit I’ve been talking makes it doubtful I’m excited he’s coming home.. But really, I am.

Happy New Years, y’all. Be careful. Don’t drink and drive.. and don’t be making babies with women you don’t wanna baby with. Condoms. Use them. Goodnight. Until next year