Cross faded/or: Cross Examined. in Questions

Is there a person in your life that can always make you smile?
No.
No one can actually MAKE me smile, nor do I have anyone I rely on for that particular form of mind control. I do have friends that I know I can commiserate with and we will almost certainly leave the conversation feeling a sick sense of comradery, but I don’t think it’s something I look towards as like, “This person really cheers me up.”
Luckily, I am very good at smiling, so I smile when I am with people because people enjoy other people who smile.

Is there someone who meant a lot to you at one point, and isn’t around now?
There are several people who meant a lot to me at some point who aren’t around anymore.
Some of them are dead.
Most of them are bridges I’ve burned.
A few of them are just the kind of people who pass through your life for a bright and beautiful moment to illuminate the darkness for no other reason than to exist as reminder that soft moments happen.

Are you a jealous person?
No, I am not a jealous person, but I have been burned several times in the past by several people and it makes me a suspicious person, it makes me an un-trusting person. It has made me socially anxious, and it has made me co-dependent.

Would you cry if you found out you were pregnant?
I’m not even going to lie, if I found out I was pregnant I would just keep the baby and be so awe struck by the things I don’t understand in this existence that I would truly believe God came down from heaven and fucked my magical man-uterus and the child I was about to have was going to be the second coming of Jesus Mother Fucking Christ.

When is the next time you’re traveling out of state?
January, hopefully.
I’ll be going to Utah to hopefully see my grandpa before he dies.

Can you write your name in a foreign language?
Yeah, it’s the same thing.
Don’t be stupid.

When you’re getting ready for something, do you listen to music?
I listen to music every chance I get.
The only time I didn’t do this was when I was 28 and I had decided that I was no longer going to pursue a career in music…I spent the next two years not listening to any music of my own accord, and only listening to Podcasts and talk radio.
I felt pretty burned…sometimes I go sort of all or nothing.

Do you leave the curtains/blinds closed or open while you sleep?
I leave the curtains open and I leave my door open.
Literally just wide open, any manner of creature can walk in at their leisure and I wouldn’t actually give a fuck because I don’t give a fuck about anything mother fucker.

What is your favorite day of the week?
I have been working since I was 12 and I have never worked an office job, so the concept of weekends was very quickly blown apart for me…on top of that, working so much in the service industry, I have had holidays blown apart for me…days are meaningless, time is an illusion, there is only the present.

Do you generally do the same thing every day of the week?
No, I do different shit all the time.
Am I still bored?
Yes.

What is something you did yesterday and wish you could’ve done today?
Nothing, yesterday was a great day.
Today I am doing new things.

If you woke up tomorrow and knew/spoke a different language, which language would you want it to be?
Russian so I could assimilate more easily with our new communist overlords.

What did you last order online?
I’m pretty sure it was a pizza.

Do you have any specific hobbies?
I paint, draw, make music, cook, read, write, do standup comedy…I don’t consider any of them to be my hobbies. They are necessary outlets. I don’t have any hobbies.

What’s a song you recently discovered that you want to tell everyone about?
I would rather keep secrets.

Favorite fall or winter accessory?
I have a whole bunch of jackets that I never get to wear.
I might go see the NutCracker this holiday season and wear a suit.

Do you like to swim?
No, I don’t really like to get wet anymore, that’s something that has kind of happened in the last ten years.

How many books are in your room?
Easily over a hundred, probably short of two hundred.

What did you last eat?
French toast and eggs.

Name one of your goals for this year.
To pay off my debt.

What does your 9th message on your phone say? “yeah, just sleeping on the couch.”

Look to your left. What’s there?
My phone, a blanket, my sleep mask.

How long does it take you to fall asleep?
I don’t even know. Once I decide to fall asleep it’s usually not that long of a process.

Are you scared about the end of the world?
No, I would rather die with everybody than die alone. Also, it is extremely exciting to be a part of something like this, how often has the world ended? Only a handful of times that we can really see, so this event is extremely rare.

Is there a TV in the room you are in?
No, I have no TV, but I have my laptop that’s pretty much just a really expensive TV.

What are you looking forward to?
Nothing, really.

What comes to your mind when I say red?
Riding hood.

What other language do you want to be fluent in?
Spanish, and I’m not terrible with Spanish, but I could be a lot better.

Do you crack your neck often?
I never crack my neck, that sounds terrible and painful.

Worst feeling in the world?
The inside of your mom.

Name something you think is pointless?
Life

Favorite fast food restaurant?
Del Taco.
I don’t really do fastfood.

Have you ever been in a fist fight?
Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww YEEEEEEeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh

Did you have a weird dream last night?
I never have weird dreams, they’re always the same shit. It’s just like my regular life, except I can fly.

Do you wish at 11:11?
Not really.
I don’t believe in wishes.