Unknown 27.01.14 in Your Face

I worry about what sort of relationship I will be going back to once I get to the US. My friend said that he was frustrated at M and I because we're both so stubborn. I can agree with that, but I don't think I can shoulder any blame for the rest of this mess. I message and email him regularly, just normal stuff, and I get nothing from him. He refuses to answer my direct questions, yet expects me to place my trust in him. In who? I don't even know him any more.

I have no motivation. I spent the 3 day weekend running DVDs non-stop, reading, working on a jigsaw puzzle and lying on my bed. I lied about having plans because I didn't feel like going to a party. It's THAT bad. And I can't concentrate, I read for ten minutes before I have to put the book down.

Do ya think I might be depressed?

Tomorrow is gym day. I think I might increase my calories burnt to 600. I've lost a little weight, and my body is shaping up, but I need something to focus on, that is just for me. I need to figure out where I will go once this 30 day pass expires.

I hate feeling angry and upset at him. I want to feel happy and at peace.