OD memories in Open Diary days

Who doesn't have OD memories? I started this diary when I was lonely. I met a couple people off this site. I got to know so many of you. I might have not spent a lot of time here in the past few years but I'm never going to leave. Might take me some time to come back but I'd always come back. Can not get rid of me. Sad to think I can not come here anymore.

I had deleted a lot of my entries years ago. I wanted a new start. Forget things and people. I know some people look back on their older entries but I do not. I write it and pretty much forget about it. I just want to know what is going to happen next. If anything sometimes. As much as I lived in the past I was ready for the future.

My loneliness brought a male friend who I met in person a couple times. He made me have feelings for him. I really felt that I loved him and I could be with him forever. We met and we took each other virginity. Not saying someone should do that. We spent about every night on the phone. On my break at work I would talk to him. I even bought a webcam so we could video chat. Later on he came back and then told me after we met for the second time that we would never be able to be together. He said it was family values on his side. Also pushed me to go back to school. Which I took classes but never went anywhere with that. What would I even go to school for. Still not sure if I would ever go to school for. Anyway this guy really broke my heart. Really made me feel like a complete zero. Spent time in my closet. Slept in my closet. Afraid to come back out. Made a fake diary just to talk to him again just to be rejected from him again. He fell for her/me right away. Never really knew if he was sincere or not. How many girls did he meet? How many girls did he fall for? I would like to know what happened to this guy. Is he still out there?

I met another lady who now I think is a total b*tch. She told me it hurt her to have a daughter around my age to be feeling as lonely as I was. She had connections to the current town I live in. When she came to visit she let me know and I met her. She was in town to see another OD member. After we met she never talked to me again. Claimed she was busy but posted she was bored.Never heard from her again. Don't really care for her.

I had a good friend here who had problems. She met a guy here who was no good for her. I don't know if they ever met in person or not. She feel for him and he kept breaking her heart. She was a virgin and she wanted to be with him. She went crazy over him. I told her how I felt about her meeting him. She did not like it. She went crazy on me sending me messages on facebook and emails. I ended up blocking her and just not bothering to ever talk to her again. Now I want to talk to her. To know how things turned out. She had so many diaries. She had so many fake names and email addresses. Will I ever talk to her again? I would like to.

Talked to another girl who was lonely. She wanted a husband and kids. She wanted it now. She found a guy in the military who was shipped out on duty. I thought they were in love. Talked to each other everyday. Then she met another military guy who she fell in love with while the other guy was out on duty. They were long time friends or something. They got married. I think the other guy lost his mind when she left him for someone who was in the military and there. They had kids. I stopped reading her diary. It seemed if you were not married or knew someone in the military she didn't care for you. I could not even leave her notes. How could someone love someone so much just to leave them for someone else? She is still active on OD but as I see her marriage in in danger now. Maybe she rushed into married too soon.

Another girl here to me rushed into marriage and had kids right away and now their relationship is in danger. Who I would like to stay in contacted with but has not been here in months. She changed into a totally different person when she got married.

I know another girl who got married to the guy of her dreams just to be let down by him over and over again. Their marriage came to a end. She found another guy but I don't know much more then that. I would like to know what happens in her life. She deleted her facebook because she was sick of every ones happy lives and marriages.

I will not write about my current friends who still update here daily.

Why can not someone save this site? Someone pay for this site? To make sure it never ends?

I am going to prosebox.net as many people are. My screen name is the same if you want to continue to follow me. I will post here and there until this site is no more.