😳Missed Flight SH-6 in Strangely Estranged

Too scared to go on board the Soul Harvester 6, think I’m gonna apply for religious political asylum here. Beautiful country and city! Makes home.. well, look like home.

Last night I got all depressed looking at Mariah Carey’s “Obsessed” video. They’re portraying me as that heavy set guy staring at Mariah’s ass? Check 1:15 in video. Walking by him she’s more scared than she is of the real stalker.

Everything they do they make it at least twice as bad as actual event. You have to embellish my life because the truth is often times way too boring. I do something one time as a tween and I’m labeled like I’m hanging out at the schoolyard waiting to abduct.

Adam Lanza’s alien “deer in headlights” eyes are supposed to look like mine? The fat guy tied up in Depeche Mode’s “Wrong” video is supposed to be me too? Stephen Paddock, uh… zero resemblance.

So I used to watch Power Puff Girls, that’s about only connection I can see. I haven’t worn a mustache like these guys in years. Martin from Exit 57 Marriage Counseling is me too???

Xavier Renegade Angel, I’m supposed to be the white kid in black face being adopted by the upscale black couple? Right, I force the couple to have sex with me under threat of turning them in for the same act? You people see it and believe it. If they didn’t exaggerate would it be funny? I doubt it.

And how on Earth does Donald Trump, The Queen and North Korea’s President look or act like me? I’m not a racist, womanizing, pig who manhandles people’s asses as they walk by and has hookers pee on bed just to create some crazy sympathetic thing against the Obamas. When have I done that? When have I called for execution of any member of the party?

The reason I’m hated so much is because my life is distorted so much through a biased lense that must win whatever this crazy thing is, at all costs. They never play fair and you people all believe anything they say. You guys should already know how they are.

For the things I have done, why don’t I get any credit for being subject of possibly one of the most elaborate mind and behavior control projects the world has ever witnessed?