that true delight in addressing the public

busy bee
i fake a smile.

but then i think,
or is it real? and i only tell myself it’s fake because i want to be above it

more enlightened than that true delight
surely i’m more advanced than this (you)

you who cannot understand me
to whom i cannot convey my deepest thoughts
a language barrier or rather a conduit
for only those dumb fun uncondescending parts of me

and i don’t feel understood
but does that mean i don’t feel good?

is it good for me or just repression
to deny the darkness in my nature and embrace a simpler me