The American Dream in Book Four: Ichi-no-Tani 2017

I might not ever publish this one. I’ve already published two articles today. But then… a dark, dreary, rainy day where I am stuck in the Ames Office with ZERO other people tends to make me want to go to Prosebox. Because… it is what I did when there was ZERO other people in Tiny Town… it is what I did when there was ZERO other people in the Law Library. Apparently, I need to start asking why jobs always want me to be COMPLETELY ALONE. It is a weird and uncomfortable trend. I mean… I walk past offices with other people in them all the time. I read about them, I see television programs about them… I even vaguely remember them. Other attorneys I know have “Office Environments” that involve other people. So… why is it that I am doomed to be the 1 lone person in an office with nobody around?

That isn’t why I’m writing, though. I’m writing because, again, I look to what I want in this world and feel… broken… that what I want is so simple and yet… continues to be out of reach.
Why is this

so fucking hard to get?

What do I need to get it?
(1) A steady job where the paycheck is reliable.
(2) Health insurance that will take care of me/my wife if we have issues.
(3) A job with reliable, steady scheduling to know when/if I can be home for my family.

At the moment? I can’t get a house. No idea what my pay is going to be from month to month; but I know my year to year is $30k.
And I’ve already waxed annoying about the schedule. Dawn to Dusk 5 days a week would even be kinder in some ways… at least I’d know it was consistent.

And as all of this swims in my mind, choking the air from me, metaphorically speaking…
I go on Job Websites. Indeed, Monster, Glassdoor, DesMoinesHelpWanted.... I check Recruitment Companies. Palmer Group, QS, and others. And… I’m stuck. Because I can do anything and nothing. I could try for the HR Job that requires “An associates degree and computer skills” but… really? A 2 year degree is all that is required… I have a J.D. Would I even want that job? Would I have a chance at getting hired? Would the job feel degrading, would it make me supercilious? OR I could try for the Finance Analyst. True, I suck at math and I’m really not great with numbers. But the job requires at least a Bachelor’s Degree. Or what about all of these “no education required” jobs? SYSCO Foods is looking for Warehouse Workers. The job would go from 4 pm to Midnight but it would pay around $20 per hour with benefits.

I just… I just want a job. That I can do. That will pay me and give me health insurance. And not ask for 60 hours a week.